Maybe They Do Notice Monday, April 23rd, 2018
My husband needs a clean workspace to start a new project. I respect people like him, but I’m just the opposite. Often, if I want to motivate myself to do all of the things I HAVE to do, I take on a project that I WANT to do. It makes all of those less fun things seem more manageable.
For example, this weekend I didn’t want to tackle the clothes on my bedroom floor, but I feel like I could take on the giant project of painting my bedroom. So, that’s exactly what I did.
With a house full of things (and people) demanding my attention, I decided to paint my bedroom walls white. Have you seen this look all over Instagram or Pinterest? As a blogger, I notice stuff like this.
So, I went for it. I bought a gallon of “Night Blooming Jasmine” from Home Depot and started to paint. But this story isn’t actually about the wall color or my avoidance of laundry.
This story is about the three-year-old little boy sitting on my bed playing with Legos while I painted my room.
This guy watches everything I do. He’s not quite as much of a little shadow as his big sister was at his age, but he isn’t ever very far from me.
I rolled the white paint across the walls while his little voice was the background track of my afternoon, telling me all about the construction site police jail he was building and why he had chosen each Lego piece.
He was chatting away when all of a sudden he stopped, looked up and said, “Oh wow, Mommy. Look at what a good job you’re doing. You’re doing a very good job!”
So sweet, right?!
I thanked him. “That’s so nice, buddy. Thanks for telling me I’m doing a good job. It’s nice to notice and tell our friends when we think they’re doing a good job.”
He went back to building and said,
“I know’d that, Mommy. That’s why I telled you that. Ethyone tells Kolton he’s doing a good job. Ethyone tells Kadence she’s doing a good job. Ethyone tells me I’m doing a good job. But nobody tells Mommy.”
I turned around.
“Nobody ether tells you that you’re doing a good job. But I telled you. I see you doing a good job lots of times. You’re very good at the stuth (stuff) you do.”
I put the roller back into the paint tray and went over to the bed where he was sitting.
“Thanks, for noticing, Jax. That means so much to Mommy.”
I gave him a hug, excused myself from the room and walked into my bathroom to cry alone. (My three-year-old doesn’t quite understand happy tears just yet.)
Alone, I cried for lots of reasons.
I cried because he was right. I guess it does feels like no one notices. It does feels like I just give and do and like no one notices any of the work.
I cried because I didn’t realize how much I needed someone to notice. I didn’t realize that even though it’s my joy to love my family and serve them and care for them that it would be nice to hear, “You’re good at it. You love us well. I see all of your hard work. You take care of us well. Thank you, Mom.”
And I cried because maybe they do notice. Maybe they’re thinking it. Maybe they just don’t say it as often as my heart apparently needs to hear it.
Maybe you need to hear it too.
Whether you have a baby who can’t even hold herself up yet, or a pre-teen who would rather be with his friends… our kids know who keeps their worlds spinning. Our kids know who to cry for when they need help.
They might not understand the stress or the work or the exhaustion involved… but maybe just maybe they do notice all of the stuths we do… and maybe they know just how good at it we really are…