To The Momma at Chick-Fil-A

I saw you come in with your sweet kids the other day – one on your hip and one around your leg. I watched as you ordered your lunch, and then set the baby on the counter to dig through the diaper bag for your wallet. I wanted to cheer for you as they handed you your drinks, and you somehow managed to get a toddler, a baby, a diaper bag and three drinks back to your table without any spills. Very impressive. Honestly, I would have helped, but I was in the middle of my own lunchtime adventure.

I couldn’t help but recognize myself in your shoes.

I loved them by the way – your shoes. Super cute. I could tell that you had made an effort in what you decided to wear that day. But girl, I couldn’t help but chuckle as I noticed that just above your adorable infinity scarf were sleepless eyes on a makeup-less face surrounded by messy hair.

I did the same thing. I threw on some cute clothes, but with no time to fix my hair or makeup, called it good enough and wrangled three little kids out the door to do whatever errands I needed to get done today before naptime.

Don’t worry – we’ll fix ourselves up later.

First, it was an extra straw. Your oldest dropped his on the floor before it could even make it into his cup. And then, it was extra napkins for the spilled drink.

And after they brought your food, you spent the next 10 minutes getting ketchups opened and nuggets cooled and spills wiped.

And just as you were about to find a minute to take a bite of your own food, the kids declared that they were done and were ready to go play in the play area.

Don’t worry. We’ll eat… later.

It’s the story of our lives isn’t it?

The kids are awake early and demanding breakfast? I’ll sleep later.

The baby needed a new outfit after a messy diaper? I’ll get myself dressed nicely later.

We’ll get our make-up on, and our roots dyed, and maybe even a proper shower… later.

The kids are finally buckled into the car but you really need to “go?” Don’t worry, I’m sure your post baby bladder can handle 20 minutes until you get home… you can go later.

The baby is screaming at the store but you need to grab the one item left on your list that was for you? Forget it. You’ll buy it later.

It will finally be our turn… later.

And as I watched you bag up the nuggets that they will want to eat when they are finished playing, I thought to myself, “It’s worth it you know.”

All of the times that we get to be mommy? All of the moments that are completely ordinary and yet often completely overwhelming? They’re worth it.

All of the times that you have sacrificed for your kids might seem to go unnoticed, but today, I want you to know that I see you. Right in the middle of your beautiful chaos. And seeing what we do as important and meaningful and worth it? Well, friend, that’s one thing that just cannot wait until later.

 

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Comments

  • amy says:

    So true. And you know, sometimes I miss having them to take care of. Not all the time, and in no way want to start over, but when. They call from college and just need some time with mom…i take it. Mostly, it is to go shopping and stock up on groceries but the time together and conversation is time I cherish even now.

  • meg isaacs says:

    Oh I love your blog! You always reach me when the Lord knows I need reached out to. :)Have a wonderful and beautiful blessed day yourself! And all you other moms out there today!

  • Beth says:

    I absolutely adore your blog. You uplift me so much, as a single, childless woman. You give me joy and hope in your writing that one day, I too can feel the joy you do. You are truly blessed and I am too, to have found your writings. Thank you for your wonderful words. They are dearly appreciated.

  • Kim Linn says:

    This was super duper beautiful! Recently I watched an opposite scene take place. I was at the grocery store and watched a little boy around the age of 6 or 7 “ride” the buggy towards his mom. And then I listened as the stressed mom lit into her little guy about what not to do with a shopping cart in a store. Now I was a pretty stern mom at times, especially when we were out in public. And I might have reacted to one of my children back in the day as this young mom did to her fun loving little boy. So on that day I was torn between the thought that yes, she was doing the ‘proper’ thing, but like myself, would she someday look back in say 10 + years and long to reclaim the time when her boy, now all grown up, had once had a silly moment in a store, and wish she had been more in the moment. *** Thank you for sharing your sweet story. Kim

  • AnnieG says:

    This is a wonderful read! Thank you for posting it.

  • Rhonda Overby says:

    I loved reading “To the Momma at Chick Filet”. I remember those days. I just can’t remember how I had the energy to do all the things I did with/for my children. Moms I know it is tough struggling with those little ones and not having a moment for yourself. But there comes a time when those little ones are grown and you have more than enough moments to yourself. Enjoy every minute of time you have with those little ones and their sticky little fingers and messy faces. Soak up all the hugs and kisses that you can. Because as everyone tells you when your first baby is born, the time does fly by. My precious little ones are 29 and 32 years old. Oh, how I miss those adorable faces and chubby little hands that used to reach to hold Mommie’s hand.

  • Denise says:

    My children are grown, but I have a dayhome and grandchildren living two blocks away so am never in a child-free state…
    I love your blog and can so relate!!! Thanks for sharing and making my day!

  • Belinda says:

    AMEN! :-) I’m recently new to the toddler plus infant stage. I have a 2.5 month old and a little over 2 year old that just started walking and is wobbly…(had a rough start to life)so I can totally relate to the lady at the chick-fil-a! Thank you for sharing this. It helps to be reminded we are NOT alone! And that sometimes us momma’s just do the best that we can and that has to be enough!

    THANK YOU again!

  • Katie says:

    Today I was that mom at Chickfila. With triplet just-turned-three-years-old daughters and a baby boy just weeks from arriving, it was my turn to waddle into the crowded store, a heavy bag on my shoulder, hair in a ponytail, and dressed for the gym (which I had just left). Not a bit of make up. And we used the potty, got our lunch, wiped up spills, and reminded each girl at least a dozen times to please sit on her bottom and try to limit wiggling while eating before we spent forty minutes with the play area all to ourselves, during which time I leaned my head back and just enjoyed the giggles. And every three minutes yet another stranger interrupted my attempt at eating to ask, “are they triplets?!” “All girls! Wow!” “You’re so brave to bring them all out!” “What are their names?” “What good girls!” And any number of other comments/questions that I field every.time. I run an errand or spend any time in public with my sweethearts. So much so that one of my daughters automatically introduces herself and her sisters, ending with “we’re all triplets!” Youre right; it is worth it every time, every moment.

  • Kiely Alcott says:

    Beautiful Nik! Oh so true, so many time I find myself
    Saying I’ll get to it later. This was refreshing to read
    Thank you! Xoxo

  • Sasha says:

    This is truly such a beautiful and encouraging piece. I would almost guess that was me you saw, and I suppose it really was. You saw straight into the hearts of so many mommies with young kids, and you spoke depths.

  • Sandy says:

    Mine are grown now, but they appreciate all those little things all the more now as they realize how tough life can be sometimes, especially as they are young parents now. Even though this is not written to my age group I find your blog so uplifting and encouraging. Wish I had had it when I was a young mother, of course, we didn’t have internet yet then. Lol! Thank you for your insights and practicality!

  • Joni says:

    So true but I have not left the habit of putting myself last and my youngest is 15. Just a year and half ago I got my 1st granddaughter, now I’m back in the cycle of chicken nuggets, spilled drinks and dropped straws. Just being a mother I guess. LOL

  • Mike Fiske says:

    It’s not just moms, although I agree with every word. Many days I went to work with spit up on my shoulder or my dress shirt half tucked, more than once with two different socks. Now 17 and 12, we both cherish every moment with them. Helicoptering? I don’t think so. We know well have quiet evenings again soon enough. Now, it’s cross country and plays and basketball and dance and it’s almost every night and we wouldn’t change a second of it. From a dad, keep it up, moms and dads!

  • Shawn says:

    love this- but just wanted to say that sometimes it’s the dads that are going on this adventure. My biggest frustration is never my three sons and daughter, ranging from new born to six at two year intervals, but how so many people make it seem like I’m doing something amazing. I’m a dad- perfectly capable of taking my kids out by myself. It does not take superhero strength and it is no more or less impressive then when it’s my wife who does it.

  • peggy says:

    I had just gotten off the phone with my daughter when I saw your blog post on FB! It made me smile and brought back so many memories of sacrafices and hoping and praying that I was doing the right things when she was little. Fast forward 20 yrs later and with those selfless acts paid off, Im missing her terribly, not getting to see her very often as she’s in her 7th yr of college, over an hour away, and will become a DMD next year. Now it’s me that calls to say “Could I bring you some homemade chili or chicken soup? Could we go shopping and grap some dinner?” Just anything really to get to spend a stolen few minutes with her because she’s so busy. It seems like only yesterday she was little. Times really does fly so enjoy them when they are small and cherish those times with them because before you know it they’re adults. Thanks for the pleasant reminder of sweet memories! :)

  • Allison B says:

    I could be this lady if you add another kid. While the days of babies and toddlers are behind me, I remember them well. Anytime we left the house felt like an accomplishment. Now I see moms with young children struggling and I thank God for giving me my babies that I enjoyed when they were young, and also for the fact that they are older and a little easier. At least everyone can walk now :)

  • Taylor says:

    Love this! There are days that I feel like I’m going to crater & I come to your website & it never fails your words lift me up. I just want to say thank you :) & God is truly working through you.

  • Morgaren says:

    I loved the story. I try to discuss with new parents the need for a balance a lot in these matters personally. I see a lot of times parents confuse self sacrifice with giving into the child’s demands, one is sweet and nurturing while the other is rather self defeating to the overall goal of parenthood.

  • Cindy Bowlin says:

    Loved it. Exactly how I feel working a 40 plus hour a week at a very demanding job. Three kids in soccer, one dog, one cat, loads of laundry that I would rather throw away then wash, socks, dinner, elementary school homework.

    The only difference. . .I am their Grandmother.

  • Steven Ashworth says:

    I’m a single dad of two girls and we go to Chik-Fil-A every Monday night for kids eat free and this is my dilemma also. It’s nice to just read that people actually notice us single parents doing everything we can to take care of our kids.

  • Carrie says:

    Thanks for your post. I want to personally share two things. One, I’m the mom of only one but often feel the same way. No matter how many kiddos are in tow, we’re still mamas and they stilll come first. Two, I am the marketing director for Chick-fil-A in Lynchburg, VA. For this very post we have created Mommy Valet where we bring everything to the table, set it up for you and make sure you have all the “extras” you need! (Not the point of the blog, I know, but just thought I would share!) I enjoy your blog!

  • TaylorJ says:

    I needed this today. I have 2 beautiful daughters, 4 1/2 and 14 months, and as I’m heading into my 2nd trimester with baby number 3, I catch myself wondering what made me feel like I was able to handle another one. Thank you for helping me remember that even though motherhood isn’t always the glamorous lifestyle we dream of, that it is worth it. It is worth the cute smiles, the quick hugs, and the lost sleep.

  • Amy says:

    Love your blog so happy I stumbled upon it

  • Beautiful blog! And thanks to Kim Lin for the comment about appreciating the silly moments. So often I jump on my kids, especially my four year old son, only to see strangers grinning at his latest antic. Wish I could enjoy it, too, and not feel so much pressure to be sure he doesn’t turn into a reprobate.

  • Jaclyn Hevener says:

    Thank you for sharing. Your posts are always an encouragement to me. Later is definitely the word for the rest of our childrearing lives, isn’t it…so worth it, though!

  • Sarah Parham says:

    Beautiful post. It only took my oldest going to her first day of kindergarten (or the open house before that day to be exact) to realize how fast it goes! Mine are still little, but I grieve at each birthday that passes knowing I’ll never have that 3 year old back. These kinds of posts are so refreshing for the daily grind. Thank you for writing.

  • Libby says:

    This was lovely to read.

  • KatieLM says:

    Thank you. Today…was just one of those days. Exhausted, the word doesn’t even come close to how I feel.

    Needed the reminder that’s this is all worth the effort. Couldn’t have come at a better moment…

  • Christi says:

    Love it! This is me all the time with 4 kids usually doing these things by myself and that is exactly what I look like, minus the scarf! But yes it does take forever and happens just like that!!

  • Katie says:

    I have honestly just dropped in tears!! I’m a first time mama to a 1 year old and getting through the day is a nightmare!! Sometimes I don’t get chance to brush my hair, its just straight up in a pony tail. I hardly sleep

  • Paula Frazier says:

    Enjoy the chaos now because the “later” comes quicker than you can possibly imagine.

  • nancy says:

    Yes, LATER….right now I am in the later time…and guess what…still we serve! I am blessed that during this phase..I am still giving to my teenaged boys & my oldest son who is 20 but has special needs and my hubby and I are blessed to be caring for our parents…and we still have later. This life is about service…and doing hard things!

  • Lindsey says:

    Are you talking about me lol. This just happened word for word to me the other day! If I’m being honest, this happens to me daily! Great post!

  • I am a first time reader of your blog. PThis post really spoke to my heart. It made me cry for the way I get caught up in my own frustrations and daily craziness. I get in such a fuss over the silliest things; rough housing, getting loud, kicking the back of my seat, not behaving on the stores, not completing tasks correctly or in a timely manner (this is mainly for my A.D.D, highly creative and intelligent 8 yr old that can make me want to scratch my face off sometimes) or just whatever is ticking me at the moment. Sometimes I’m not so bad. Usually if I only have one child for whatever reason that day, or if things are a little more calm for awhile. But it’s ok excuse and it breaks my heart that I can’t find joy, all the time. Why do I have to be a replica of my mother that flipped out over nothing all the time too. And we barely have a relationship now. I just want to have a great one with my kids, but I find it such a struggle to let go of all these petty things. But your right, I can already see it flying by. And I’m waisting it. Thank you for the tug on my heart to open my eyes. I needed that.

  • Alice says:

    Love the blog! O how I long for those moments again. Time does fly. Turn around and they are in preschool. Turn around and they are dressing themselves. Turn around and they are selecting their own clothes.. Turn around and they are driving . I could go on and on ….. I am now alone with no babies and grown children. I have more than enough time to get my self together….keep a clean house…etc… But I wish and long for finger prints on the glass and the TV. Spills on the floor ….etc … Cherish your time! Read to them, swing all day, hunt for treasures, plant flowers,bake cookies, play dress up, make believe is so wonderful , tea parties, make tents, picnics, hunt for bugs and catch butterflies and lightening bugs, just talk and laugh….hold them and give lots of hugs and kisses…..

  • Johnnie says:

    I’m a grandmother now & enjoyed every moment of it. I still cherish my time with my children growing up with all the chaos in the message. If I could do it all over again, I would gladly go back & start over with having my babies again & all through their growing up years. So all of you who struggle now with your young ones, remember they grow up & are gone so fast. After that, you’ll wonder what you’ll do now that they’re gone. God Bless all of you who are in the midst of having your babies with you.

  • Emma says:

    I heart this.

    I’m right in the middle of many “laters” but I know they’re so. completely. worth it.

    xo

  • Marsha Kidd says:

    This was a great read… Even though my son is almost 22 … My niece 23 and nephew 25 … I have been in this position and look forward to spending as much time as possible with my 8 month old granddaughter. I would not trae being a mother for anything in this world. I love being the woman I am!

  • Amy says:

    This was definitely me! I had a 9yr old when my twin boys came along. Even managing to go grocery shopping was a feat. Two infant carriers equals two carts to put them in and then trying to put the food around the carriers. Pushing one while pulling the other and trying to make sure the 9yr old wasn’t filling up the carts with junk food. Phew! Don’t know how I made it threw those years, but yet strangley wish I was still there as it was so much easier than two six year olds and a wonderfully helpful (sarcasm) 15 year old. Not certain I’ll survive the teenage years, but I will certainly continue to give it my all.

  • Amber says:

    It goes by so fast we have to stop and smell the roses… and take a million pictures.

  • Ellen says:

    I was this mom TODAY! Thank you so much for your words of encouragement!

  • Shavonne says:

    love this… and love you for writing and posting it!

  • jamie says:

    So true for others and this mommy

  • Angela says:

    Read at the right moment after changing clothes twice because my nearly two year old just tossed his cookies. After all the chaos of cleanup, I sit with him in my lap watching football praying it’s just a 12 hour thing and he’ll be better by morning.

  • Gilbert_Sundevil says:

    As the husband of a wife who sometimes had to do things “later”, I hope you know you are appreciated. I made an effort to tell my wife “thank you” every day. The kids are a bit older now, so some of the “laters” are finally happening. My awesome wife is about to get her degree. She rocks.

    PS – I begged my wife early in our marriage to not worry about the roots. There’s plenty of debatable commentary out there about spouses making sure the don’t “let themselves go”, but the root thing is one area where I think it’s ok. Seriously, you’ll end up 65 years old with jet black hair with no graceful way to make the leap to your natural color. My wife has earned those gray hairs. They are part of what makes her beautiful to me.

    That’s my $0.02.

  • Candace says:

    I feel like she is talking about me because I remember a day just like this at chic-fil-a with my children.

  • bree says:

    I really needed this tonight!! Got off work at 430&hubby had already went to work so I had to pick up the 3year old and 5month old to do grocery shopping…with 2 sick babies, it was hectic!! Needless to say,im still in my work clothes:/ Thank you so much for this

  • […] To The Momma at Chick-Fil-A from Scissortail Silk […]

  • Samantha says:

    As I lay here in bed not wanting to get up and bring the kids to school because sleep is so precious these days…. I cried because somehow I felt like you were talking straight to me. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

  • Dana says:

    Thanks for this!

  • Jen says:

    Cherish it because it won’t last forever. It’s only temporary…

  • Kierstin says:

    Oh how I needed to read this today. Sometimes I feel like I’m drowning in the chaos that is raising a toddler and keeping a home. Thank you for the encouragement that I so badly needed today.

  • Patti says:

    Beautiful! I miss those times. You brought a smile and tears to my eyes at the same time.

  • Leanne says:

    Thank you. Just, thank you. I keep reminding myself that “the days are long but the years are short.” As I sit here sobbing reading your post, I’m watching my 9 month old try to stand unassisted and have my ears on alert for my two year old to wake up asking for me. Some days you feel so alone and unappreciated- even though that’s not the case- and knowing there ARE others out there who understand means so much.

  • Reva says:

    I know that feeling all to well! I have two step sons 14 and 13 then my little ones are 6 5 2 and 1 I know the feeling of later! I wouldn’t change any of it even if I could I love of little family. I also struggle anytime we go out especially when I have all of them but the older boys help with there brothers and sisters. Just wanted to say loved the story thank you for reminding me that I am not alone!

  • Tiffaney says:

    Love it! It’s so true this article helped to brighten my day.

  • Jean Wilson says:

    you and moms like you need to check out the moms bible study “beautiful mess”. It’s inspired by the movie “moms night out”.

  • Christina says:

    Loved this blog. This is the story of my life. My oldest is starting high school in a year and she has been the easy going and well behaved child a parent could hope for. I already miss the days of having to tie her shows and doing her hair. There will be time later and then we won’t know what to do with it. My other two are a handful, ages 11 and 6.

  • Alycia says:

    This is so true. Over and over again, we make sure the kiddos have what they need first before ever worrying about ourselves. We “super moms” do it all for them and leave ourselves for last.i can relate to every single word you wrote. Thank you!!!

  • Shirley says:

    I cried when I read this. This was me 50 years ago. The 3 beautiful girls are now grandmothers and just as wonderful and beautiful as they were then.i thank our LORD every day for giving them to me

  • Linda Stanhope says:

    Been there and done that! As a 58, turning 59 soon year old Mom and now Grandma, I applaud you! I spent most of my children’s years as a home day care provider. Mine and theirs, usually 5 or 6 in the house so we didn’t get to go out much. But it was worth it to be home with my own children. Now, as they are both married and have families of their own I can appreciate all they are going through with their little ones. My home sure gets messy when they come over and stay with Grandma, but hey, I can clean it later!!! <3 I enjoy every minute of it! Hang in there Mommy, it is all worth it! Now, as I just took the oldest grand to school this morning, I have to go wash dishes vacuum the floor and try to get some breakfast, it's only 9:15am I thought this was supposed to end! lol

  • PAM says:

    Thank you for this post. It was just the thing I needed today.

  • Patti Martin says:

    This was a amazing read, and makes me think of my daughter-in-law and my daughter with their struggles with my beautiful grandbabies. Thank you for the reminder to appreciate them so much more.

  • Victoria Longo says:

    Simply beautiful! This was pretty much my day yesterday with the addition of a sick hubby. Thank you for your encouraging words and reminding us “it’s worth it”.

  • Dana says:

    This is an excellent post! I love it. It was so encouraging to me, as I have four littles that I care for daily. It never feels like I am good enough to get it all done. Your post was an encouragement.

  • mary mcnabb says:

    Love this article. Children grow up so fast.

  • Bobbi says:

    I love this blog!!! Love it! I am a Mother of 5. 4 boys and one girl. Boys sports, all my daughter’s dance. Her beauty pageants and fashion shows. I stay busy. School full time and I’m a Army wife. My kids are getting older now and I’m starting to miss those days. All 2 years apart and range from 5-13. Enjoy your babies while you can. Good job Mommas 😀

  • kellyandall says:

    Perfectly said!! I needed this today. Even if I am not wrangling 3 kids in the Chick-fil-a… It gives blessed meaning to that cake I just put in the oven my 6 year old and made together! In the world we live in, it is so refreshing to hear someone with a glass half full philosophy! Thanks for the smile!

  • Jena says:

    I needed this today! I feel like it was ME that you saw at Chick-fil-a!

  • Kerri Lane says:

    Bravo, so well written!! You brought tears to my eyes. I’ve been there. My boys are now 13 & 16 and just for a moment I would love to have some of those beautiful chaotic moments back. Just a day to flop them on my hip or snuggle while watching a movie. I have “my time” now, but I do so so miss being a Mommy not just a Mom.

  • Anna says:

    Thank you so much for this. I have been feeling completely inadequate lately as far as my family and this made my heart smile. As mothers we do so much and try so hard that everything be wonderful for our families but tend to be overlooked on how hard we work for them.

    Thank you for noticing.

    God Bless

  • XOve Baby says:

    What a wonderful post! Thanks for sharing!

  • You captured the selflessness of motherhood so beautifully. I also celebrate the “lifting” you have done for one mother that has undoubtedly touched many hearts. I am rocking the dark circles and the messy ponytail today with a little more sparkle than before. Thank you.

  • Sean says:

    Came here to say exactly what Mike and Shawn already said. It’s always cool to see other dads out there in the thick of it. We’re not superheroes – that’s clear. We just love the heck out of our families.

  • Susie says:

    Hi!
    Omg I just read this post about the Momma at Chic fil a. I have to tell u, it truly made my day. I have two babies, 10 and 6 and on a daily basis I feel like I’m never good enough as long as they r good and happy and have everything they need. I always read things like this but I never commented before. I just had to reach out and say thank you!

  • mayra says:

    Omg this story just brought me to tears because I can really relate right now , with having a 3 year old,2 yearold and a two month old… with all the stress of it I still cant help it but to be in total love with them and my life!!!!

  • Julie says:

    Wonderful article! I expected this to be one of those, “Let’s trash talk the SAHM” article that I see so often. This was uplifting and kind be it towards SAHMs or working moms.

    Thank you!

  • Amy says:

    Thank you for this.

    I have a four month and just starting to get a handle on motherhood before he changes his schedule up on me (again). As I think about him getting older, being the Chick-Fil-A mom overwhelms me. But, you reminded me of what I already know deep down: it is worh it. It’s always worth it.

  • Cheryll says:

    This is my life every day with my 8 and 11 year old. They are growing so fast, but I love being their momma and making sure they get what they need. I can take care of me first when they’re away at college. Unless of course I make it so they never learn to be independent and rely on me indefinitely. Ack! OK. Maybe I should back off a little. I’ll just continue to swarm them with kisses like when they were babies! My favorite line, “I love you forever. I like you for always. As long as I’m living, my baby you’ll be.”

  • Janice says:

    I keep telling myself,”Someday, they will grow up.” I already know that pregnancy and baby stage don’t last forever. I’m in the preschool stage right now, with several more in school. They even sleep through the night, most nights, unless they are sick or have a bad dream. Overall, i do have it pretty good right now! Thanks for the thoughts!

  • Lisa Simmons says:

    Ha..yes…some things never change and now I get the privilege of watching my sweet DIL with my two grandsons (ages 3 and 10mo). I wrote this song a few years ago for moms so that they might think and pause and remember that “this too shall pass” and then they’ll wish (sometimes) they could go back.http://www.reverbnation.com/greasingtheskids/song/5912921-part-of-their-world

  • Carolyn Keel Mardis says:

    I just read “Momma at Chick-Fil-A”And I can tell you one thing and that is always enjoy every single moment you have with your babies,eat em up!!You never know when it can be over,just in the blink of an eye!!I have 2 sons,Adam{who would have been 31}and Jamie{who is 28}It was like any other day in my life,Adam was going out that night,our last words were”I love you so much”and I told him “please be careful”of course he snorted at me and said”I always am Momma”The next call I got was from Adam’s friend to tell me he thought Adam was dead,it was a bad car wreck :'(When we got to the accident scene my baby was breathing but couldn’t wake up,so I did what any Momma would do,I gave my baby peace and comfort.He passed away right there in my arms while I prayed in his little ear.I never imagined that I would never see him alive again when I woke up that morning.Please treasure every teeny bit of the time you have here on Earth with your babies,you never know when it may be your last kiss or hug or the last”Momma I love you”I share this with so much love in my heart and soul to all the Mothers out there,God bless each and every one of you Ladies of God♥

  • Working Mom says:

    Eat at Home. Make a good meal and feed the kids there. Give them water instead of soda with straws that fall. Make nuggets at home and add some veggies. It will be less chaotic.

  • Ondria says:

    What a thoughtful post, and thanks for writing this. We need more encouragement like this in the world. May you be blessed, as you have blessed me greatly today.

  • Jlynn says:

    I sometimes notice new moms doing exactly what I used to do. It was hard at times but brings back sweet memories. My babies are in high school now and I’m dreading when they graduate and head to college. For now, I love that when they walk thru the door the first thing I hear is “Mama?”.

  • Ty says:

    Sure I remember having to do this….although I only had one kid. Now that my one kid has a kid, I handed the baton to her. :)

  • Katie says:

    A friend shared this on Facebook… I’ve only been a mom for 7 months but can totally resonate with this post. Everything is later but so worth it!

  • Rhonda says:

    Great blog! Mom’s are overlooked and under rated VIP’s.
    My mom raised 3 girls with very little help from Dad and worked full time. She is quite amazing!

    Thanks again for noticing Mom!

  • Big Daddy says:

    What I wouldn’t give for my 23-yr-old stepdaughter who only knows how to make babies instead of raise them to learn from this. Three babies, from three different losers, in three years, and she has no understanding of what being a mom is really all about. We all know the greatest title/rank in the world is “Mom”…and she wants that recognition, but doesn’t want to have to put in the work to earn it. My beautiful wife has given her a plethora of examples to follow, by being a fantastic cook, homemaker, professional, chauffeur, nurse, and tutor, but apparently, they just didn’t sink in, when she’s too busy expecting her mother’s generosities instead of being thankful for them.

    Sigh…thus endeth the rant.

    I see moms like the one here and I find myself tearing up with happiness over commitment and love that’s demonstrated so selflessly and silently. I’m thankful that my own mother was as giving… and celebratory for the future of the kids I see whose moms are champions like this.

    Yay, Mom!

  • Kandy Sue says:

    And what’s so true about this observation is how timeless it is.
    I’m an older mom now, with just one last girl at home to raise out of 4 kidlettes, but I remember living that exact same moment countless times as a full time SAHM over the past 31 years. All mom’s, weather at home or trying to manage a job on the side somehow, all know what us mommies do! And I am so happy to be able to read this lovely little snippet that not only acknowledges us, but celebrates and uplifts us for who we are and what we do.

    The VOCATION of motherhood is not recognized during any award ceremonies, we don’t receive a generous pension plan, gold watch, or plaque commemorating our outstanding contributions to society. (though creating and raising an honest, thoughtful, loving human being certainly should be considered as one) We are not recognized by our “boss” for our numerous sacrifices, or can look forward to the annual bonus that so many others do each year. I’m sorry, but this sweet little post did more for me today than half a dozen Mother’s Day greetings from those who actually haven’t a clue as to why Mother’s Day even exists. Nope, this did it for me today.
    Thank you abundantly as 3 dozen red roses!
    I simply love YOU! <3 <3 <3

  • JOAN says:

    Completely genuine question for all parents: What’s wrong with asking your child(ren) to wait? I understand that sometimes, things can’t wait- you NEED to change that diaper NOW, it’s not going to wait until you’re done putting on blush or tying up your hair. Your toddler NEEDS the bathroom NOW, you have to abandon that shopping cart to prevent wet pants. That’s all fine! But in situations like the author just gave- the mom has spent a good 10 minutes getting everyone situated, meaning they start eating before her and are done quicker- why isn’t she allowed to tell her kids, “wait. You got to eat, it’s Mommy’s turn now. You may play in five minutes.” In this case, her kids don’t have stinky diapers or hungry tummies. They’re not in danger of running in the street. They are just eager to play, and aren’t thinking that “hey, maybe we need to give Mommy a chance to eat,” because they’re young kids and they don’t have that empathy ability yet. What’s so wrong with teaching your children that while their needs will usually come first, their WANTS don’t get the same priorities and they will sometimes need to share with Mom?

    I’m not passing any judgment, I’m simply curious and hoping someone can give me a constructive answer.

  • Dawn Gomez says:

    Beautiful. Thank you!

  • Elizabeth says:

    I can tell you that sounds just like me. My friends with kids never understood how I did it with my 3. They only had one. They would never leave the house looking or feeling like me. My kids are older now and I still feel the way I did then I do have more time to fix my hair and put on make up if I feel up to it but I would not trade any of it for anything. I hope that if you feel down and gross give it time because once you see your kids making good grades in advance classes and doing awesome in everything they do. You will say I did a good… no I did a great job! Thank you for this story because being a real mom and doing everything on your own with out maids, servants, or help really gives you what you need to mold you close to your kids.

  • John says:

    Just read you for the first time and like others, felt a rush of memories when I had two little boys and their younger sister by myself. I remember asking one of my students to teach me how to braid so I could do this for my six year old girl with the waist length hair

  • My oldest child is 21 and married now. He calls me almost every day during the busiest part of my day but I never tell him. I put everything I can aside so I can cherish every moment of our conversation. There is always “later” and that’s ok with me. :)

    This is a beautiful post. Thank you.

  • Cicely says:

    Thank you for noticing and sharing.

  • Jennifer raines says:

    I needed to hear this today! Have you been spying on me? I have 3 kids and it seems like a thankless jin sometimes. I am so grateful to have them but it is a challenge at times.

  • Tammy says:

    This was such a beautiful story! This was me several years back, I’m a mother of 6 beautiful children and “mimi” to 2 precious boys. I’m busy in a different way now with different demands. My youngest is a 15 year old daughter if that tells you anything! It is so true that it goes by too fast. Enjoy all the precious moments and all the “little ornery things” they do because it will all be over too soon. I wouldn’t trade one second of it for the whole world. Children are a blessing and a gift from God. And I just want to say that being a mother IS the most important job you will ever do!

  • Trina says:

    I love this so much! My daughter is 21 m and I’ve been through horrible recover/pain but am finally better and want to take her everywhere. I know that most days I look the mom mentioned. And I’m okay with that because it’s awesome to make the effort to head out even just for an hour or errands. You are awesome!

  • Shelley says:

    Love this. The only thing I would add is… when you see someone like this and you get the chance, help her! When you are wrangling your own children, it may not be easy or even possible, but there will be a time. When your children are a little older, teach them to help and it will be passed on. Help her carry the food, the straws etc. Talk to the impatient children so she can eat a few bites. Let Jesus shine through you and help save her insanity, all at the same time.

  • Susan says:

    From someone who has always wanted a child of her own and was never blessed to have one, cherish those moments. I so wish I had some one to chase after and clean up for. Children are true blessings.

  • Katy Mudgett says:

    Yes, I understand the message behind the story. BUT – it’s also okay to teach your children “later”. Food isn’t finished? They don’t get to go play. Mommy’s not done? They may wait a few minutes. Patience is a virtue. If we allow ourselves to be last all the time, we’ll only teach our children that we are not valuable. We’ll teach our daughters that they, too, need to be last all the time once they become mothers. We’ll teach our sons that it’s okay to let their wives be last. That’s not a message I want to send to my children. I am important too. And wanting a proper shower or a hot meal is certainly okay, even if the little ones have to wait a few minutes.

  • Victoria says:

    I’m a new mom (to a 10 month old girl…also, how did that happen!?!?!?) and recently was telling my husband one of the hardest things about mommyhood is that it’s so rare to be thanked. No one says anything about all the little sacrifices you’re making all. the. time. And YES Jesus notices and YES they mean something and YES we should live selflessly because that is the example Christ set. Still, your simple post goes such a long way in reminding us mamas that it’s worth it.

  • Jess says:

    Mothers do notice us and they relive the “happy” moments through watching our choas. I can’t go to the grocery store without an older mom smile at me as I juggle 2 gallons of milk with baby strapped to me and toddler closing the door on me or throwing something out of the cart. At the moment, it’s hard, but only for a moment. We have to remember to be one of those momas that smile at the beautiful choas to remind the struggling mom’s that this really is some of the best times in our lives… Love the choas, live it!

  • Carrie says:

    Absolutely beautifully written. Thanks for the reminder about what really is important! You are a beautiful author!

  • Angel says:

    My daughter is 3 and I still have these days! Thank you for your kindwords! Chickfila is her fave place haha

  • Ashley says:

    I just had baby number two and I’m in the middle of this beautiful chaos myself. I can get so stressed about it, but then I look into the eyes of my 20 month old son and newborn baby girl and I’m reminded that it’s all worth it in the end and these moments now are some of life’s biggest blessings. Loved the post by the way. :-)

  • Hope Gould says:

    Thank you for this inspirational post! I teared up reading this. We all need to make a better effort to see ourselves and realize our own worth.

  • Michelle Henderson says:

    Thank you so much for this beautiful post! I needed this today. Everyone needs to be encouraged and reminded that they matter. You don’t know how much this has blessed me…tears!

  • Julie says:

    Thank you! I SO needed to hear this today. In my chaotic world, it’s nice to know that occasionally moms like us get noticed. I finally have my 3 year old down for a nap while I’m waiting for the locksmith to come fix my front door that my son broke this morning (Seriously, HOW did he manage to do that?!). It’s almost 1:30pm and I still haven’t eaten lunch yet but I’m excited I did get a shower this morning. (This is another “later” moment that usually happens during nap time). Despite the constant chaos, it IS most definitely worth it. Love your blog!

  • Vondalee says:

    What a wonderful article. I actually miss those days… I had my babies when I was 18 and 19 and they are 14 months apart. They are 22 & 23 now and I am waiting for grandchildren to spoil!
    Thanks for such a wonderful, honest article about how some moms’ lives really are!

  • Rain says:

    Or… Maybe She didn’t care that she was’t wearing make-up and didn’t have her hair done up. Maybe, just maybe, she’s perfectly happy being make-up free, and loves her natural hair color and would never think of touching up her roots… Maybe she’s not that materialistic, and is happy just the way she is.

  • Sarah says:

    thank you for this post. You saw me……;)

  • Maureen says:

    So sweet and I wish more mothers were so uplifting. Other moms can be SO judgmental, and for those people who don’t have kids and you can feel them stare at you like you and your three kids are wild animals. My kids are usually well behaved but that doesn’t mean our outings are always perfect. We spill drinks, drop ice-creams and have meltdowns its part of being mommy. But people don’t always see it that way. The can’t look past the noise, crazy hair, and unkempt hair. It is refreshing that YOU can look past all that and see the beauty of mommyhood

  • Ashley says:

    This was so sweet. Thank you for posting this and giving us the chance to read it. I 2, almost 3, kids, and this was just what I needed to read today. :)

  • Ken says:

    For the first time in generations, men are stepping into the role of “Mom” as more and more mothers take the opportunity to abandon this responsibility and go find “their” time. Now, this is not the only reason that the men are left with this responsibility, but I’m seeing it more and more as feminists make more important changes in the view of women in the world.

    I am a single father of 2 boys. 13 and 9, I raised the 9 year old from the time he was born until now. Changing diapers, and feeding all alone. I don’t regret any of that time either.

  • Lisa says:

    What a lovely, sweet tribute and such a welcome departure from the usual open letters tearing into people publicly. Beautifully written. I hope the subject, wherever she is, reads it.

  • Lindsey says:

    i feel like you wrote this to me. Same situation only the older one was kicking and screaming all the way to the car because he didn’t want to leave. And I kept dropping stuff in the parking lot

  • Keri says:

    Love this! It’s so true & so frustrating at times, but so worth it. And so beautiful to know we aren’t alone in experiencing it. If you see me, I’ll be the woman who is wearing the oldest jeans & t-shirt–but they’re the nicest I have–being a SAHM/WAHM means my paychecks go to buying baby something. I’ll admire your shoes with tired eyes, & take comfort in the knowing smile :)

  • Danielle says:

    Thanks for this! I have 3 small girls of my own and we had our own Chick-fil-A adventure today. Lucky for me, daddy met us for lunch so they ate while I assisted and daddy ordered for me while we watched the girls play through the glass. As I finished lunch, I saw the mom you described above trying to get her own two little girls to leave. Fortunately, something inside prompted me to give her my hands. How many times I wished I had an extra pair of hands, even if they belong to a stranger. Maybe someday, when I need them, someone will have hands for me to borrow!

  • Pat says:

    I remember sitting in church with a child asleep on each leg and a child asleep under each arm and wondering why did I bother coming. We could be at home and comfy. I know I was there because that was exactly where God wanted me to be. Cherish ALL the moments.

  • john says:

    I loved this blog!! So many amazing moms out there that do not get the credit they deserve. Go moms!!!

  • JCP says:

    I shared your post to my blog today on my oldest son’s birthday. He’s 32 today. I’ll say … yes … it is very worth it … no matter what happens. I have provided my blogpost to you in the “website” entry. If you want to share what I wrote, feel free to do so. Thank you. That was beautiful.

  • As a mama who made it through all the above times you have described to see two beautiful daughters into college—oh yes, it is all most definitely worth it! :)

  • Pat Upchurch says:

    It is ABSOLUTELY WORTH IT. There will never be another time in your life with your kids, they deserve it and I applaud you whole heatedly. God bless you and He will because Children to Him are so special and He wants them treated special, just like He treats us. Wish I could have been there to help you in some way but thankful that God and His angels were watching over you and your sweet babies. God Bless you with many deserved blessings – always.

  • Kirsten Aust says:

    So very sweet and uplifting! As the mom of six (19 – 5 years old) I have been in that same position so many times! When I snuggle up at night with my five year old to read and smell his sweet skin or I watch my seven year old princess smile in her sleep anticipating a visit from the tooth fairy, I know I am doing something right. Nothing could be better!

  • That was me, millennia ago, only I had 6 to take care of, all under the age of 11. I never saw it as work or a burden. My children were my life and I am so grateful I had each and every one of them. They are all grown now with grandchildren of their own. I see my grandchildren with their babies and I thank God every day He has allowed me to live long enough to enjoy them too. Mothers, make every moment count and enjoy the time with your babies, they grow up and away too soon.

  • Allison says:

    Oh such a good read! I love this! So so true, and feels so good to know we’re all in it together! As mommas, we need to raise each other up and give praise! Thank you.

  • Stacey says:

    Thanks Mama! I have twin boys and feel the same way so often! Great read!

  • Ashley says:

    i needed this. thank you

  • Ashiiesmaxx says:

    That was BEAUTIFUL!!! How nice to have actual positivity for the moms who put their kids before themselves. Usually it’s posts about, how moms cant control their screaming kids, or critisisms on parenting practices. I commend you for you amazing words that i’m sure inspired not only my day but many others as well. Xoxo

  • Julie Dinkins-Borkowski says:

    All so very cute and so very true. I just ask that you also see those of us who have become invisible. Those of us with children born with special needs who likely will never out-grow diapers or out grow the need for us to put our lives on the back burner to “do-later.” When in reality we know it will go on years and years we will never get a chance to care for ourselves.

    Not that our children are not worth it. They are. But we become invisible to all the regular moms that get to move on with their lives when their children potty train, grow and leave the nest.

    We are the moms that when our children reach the noticeable school age, we fade way to the rest of those normal moms and to the rest of the world. People used to look us in the eye, and now they just avoid our gaze because if you cannot see me then I must not exist. It is a very lonely existence, so if you see one of us, let us know we are not invisible.

    It gets to us, but it wont make us stop loving our children just like the rest of the normal moms. It is just cool when someone notices.

    That is all… Carry on…

  • sara says:

    This is spot on!! We love us some Chick Fil A btw (:

  • Shannon Jackson says:

    I have to say I miss those times. I find myself lonely now that my son is older. I do want to say this… kiss your mom hug her. Answer that phone call from her even if you don’t have the time. Take time cause when she’s gone you will wish that you had those phone calls back. I know I miss my mom every day.

  • Candice D. says:

    This was shared from a family member, I am sure with no intention of it ever reaching me; there was nothing about the blog only a simple post. The intrigue of what brought me to open it was seeing a mom struggling with children. Fridays are always a hectic time for me because it is the day that all the bills get paid, naps get missed, lunch is fast, and mom is last. I like to think that my children cherish what I do for them even though it is not expressed with words. As I look over and see the pile of unfinished laundry, the sink full of dishes, and the bags under my eyes; I know that I have loved my children. I have sacrificed a magnificent home, non-sticky leather in the back seat of my SUV, un-kept hair, and a make-up less face for the happiness of seeing my children ushered from one event or friend’s house to the next, the smiles that come with every “Mom, turn this up, it is my new “favorite” song!” and hearing them sing at the top of their lungs with joy in their hearts. This was inspirational for me today because I often times forget that I sacrificed my life and beauty time for children who will have a childhood to remember. I can do me… later. Thank you for your beautiful words!

  • happy in harned says:

    Indeed worth it and now for the SOUR NOTE< That morning, Dad got up, jumped in the shower got dressed and got in his car to go to work, stopped at a local eatery, got a paper and a LARGE COFFEE, sat and drank the drink, read some paper then went on to his work place and never had a care in the world. No getting this or that, cleaning this or picking this up. His make up, although natural, looked great and his hair, fixed to the Tee!No purse, no diaper bag….just a small wallet in his back pocket, easy to get to and always in the same place, his keys there in his pocket, easy to get….you see ladies….. Its still a man's world…..

  • Angelina Howell says:

    I have totally been this mom,also know many moms like her.

  • Carol Britton says:

    My babies are 34 and 36 years old with babies of their own and I have the advantage of hindsight regarding child rearing. I had the privilege of being a stay out home mom, and am so thankful to have had that option. I’m reminded of an old poem.
    “Cleaning and dusting can wait till tomorrow.
    For children grow up, we’ve learned to our sorrow.
    So quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep.
    I’m rocking my baby, and babies won’t keep”.

  • Loretta says:

    This is true as I have three who are grown now. However, I am saddened by the fact people think a woman should “throw on makeup” to make themselves “look better.” Why can’t a woman be herself? Why can’t she put a bun or pony in or why can’t her hair be messy as those women who have no kids do as fashion?

  • brenda says:

    Love the blog

  • Terri says:

    My first two children were born 20 months apart, then ten years later I had two more, born 24 months apart.

    I remember putting my first two in the grocery cart and pushing it around the store while pulling another cart for the food behind me. Little old ladies would stop me and tell me that I was right in the middle of the best time of life.

    While I think all stages are the best, those were indeed good times.

    Now my oldest child is 27 and my youngest is almost 13. I have a son living in Germany and a daughter preparing to graduate from college. Having these real people…adults and almost-adults …is amazing and beautiful too.

    Enjoy being that mom in Chik Fil A and know that you have more wonderful stages to come!

  • Paige says:

    You should tell her those things! It is so amazing to be encouraged and understood by other mothers. So often we’re criticized for the methods we choose, its not very often you hear of mothers being supported by one other. Especially by a stranger! Unite mothers! We are raising the next generation together. Why does it have to be a battle?

  • Becky Payne says:

    Beautifully said and so true. You really have the gift of communication my dear, and it’s a blessing!

  • Mary Mravintz says:

    That article could have been me when my three children were little. The sacrifices we made for our babies were never unnoticed. My girls and son will say something about when they were little that they remembered I did and then finally it was all that mattered and was worthwhile. Love is unconditional and I would do it all over again if given the chance.

  • invisible says:

    I needed this today. thank you.

  • Danna L Schumacher says:

    I just sent my older three(I have four)back out into the world. I find that I sort of miss the days when they were all at home. Now I only have a ten-year-old left at home. I love her dearly, but one day she will be grown and independent as well(as long as I have done my job right). I can empathize with the lady in this article and just have to say relish the quiet/happy moments with them. Those moments never last.

  • Sandy S says:

    This post made me smile and feel sad at the same time. We have 5 kids, the youngest are now 18 (yes, twins!) I remember taking them to a restaurant with a food bar when the youngest were about 3 and the oldest was 9. I spent most of my time helping them go load food onto their plates. As I was in the mist of this “special lunch” I remembering thinking, “Why did I think a food bar would be a good idea??” As I was helping one of my youngest a man spoke over my shoulder, “You’re doing a great job.” I can not even tell you how much his words meant to me. I never saw his face so I was unable to thank him for his words of encouragement but as I write this 15 years later it still brings tears to my eyes. Thank you kind man in Louisville, KY! You still make my day! We should all strive to make someone’s day. An encouraging word should flow freely from those of us who have already survived those exhausting, but wonderful early years!

  • Bethany says:

    Oh, I wish I could express how much I needed to read this today! As the mom of an independent, smart & sassy three year old & a busy, teething 15 month old, I often find myself feeling completely overwhelmed. It has taken a while for me to realize that I’m not alone & it doesn’t make me a bad mom for feeling crazy! So, thank you so much for this post. I love all of this “beautiful chaos.”

  • Amy A says:

    I just read your post, at 11:59pm. Even though i was up just before 5am this morning to make my hour drive to work a ten hour shift(this is normally when i finally make it to bed) will be up early tomorrow on my day off to help my 23 yr old daughter move. Before I sank into a much needed and overdue bath at nearly midnight, I looked at myself in the mirror and thought when will I ever have time for me. A pedicure is something i dream about, make up and doing anything to my hair besides a ponytail is reserved for special occasions, and we won’t even talk about my roots or finding time to exercise. I have four kids, 14,16,20,23, and a 2yr old grandbaby. Reading your post took me back to when mine were small. I smiled a shed a few happy tears. You Are right, 23 years later I still wouldn’t trade being their mom for anything in the world. They are definitely worth it! Thanks for sharing :)
    And oh yeah, think about how much you love your children, wait until they create a life to share with you, aka, grandchild…..words cannot describe the feeling of joy when those little arms wrap around your neck, it’s sooooooooo worth it 😀

  • SALLYTURK says:

    It’s true for caretakers as well. I have had my daughter’s twins since birth and am almost seventy. It takes more make-up, not less, but despite the fact that I am quite sure I am shortening my life, there really isn’t any time of my life that I have treasured more.

  • cynthia says:

    So beautiful. I would have sworn that it was written directly to me alone, except I have 4 children (blessings). Thank you for posting. It is so encouraging to think maybe we don’t go unnoticed.

  • Megan says:

    Maybe she doesn’t wear makeup, ever. Maybe that’s not an omission from her day or something she sees as necessary. It’s a little judgy to assume that she just didn’t have time to take care of herself. Also, why can’t she let the kids play while she finishes eating? That’s why the play area is surrounded by walls of glass.

    You have to take care of yourself to be a good mom and that means taking care of your basic needs. Eating and emptying your bladder are at the top of that list. This also includes going out with your friends once in a while and not feeling guilty about it. There’s no extra brownie points for always putting yourself second.

    Life is about balance. Kids are awesome and they should always have their needs met, but sometimes it’s okay to make sure yours are met first.

  • Mark says:

    I’ll pass this on to my wife.
    I’m sure she’ll read it. …later! 😉

  • Debi says:

    You’re turn will come later….but sometimes your turn doesn’t come. Kids grow ipad and move out. Husbands leave and you’re turn disappears in the wind. Take time for yourself now. Little moments while they nap, if you can stay awake. Stolen moments just for you. Savor them. Demand them, because if you wait, you’re turn May never come.

  • Brenda says:

    I am retired now and I can tell you the best times of my life were when my kids were home and there was much to do and much sacrifice on my part . The grad kids come now but it’s only for short times…cherish the short time you have with your kids..they grow up so fast.

  • Mrs. Franzixka Bethea says:

    Loved this! It is so true what we do as mothers we put in the forefront of our daily lives and all that we do is very well worth it. I can say wholeheartedly that is so rewarding as a mother of 5 to look back on some of the seemingly most stressful days and remember that one moment your kids made you smile.

  • virginia2 says:

    This post really spoke to me. I have three children under 6 and recently seperated from husband of 10 years. Without family, friends, and a whole lot of faith (because God sees a much bigger picture and has a plan) I’m not sure I would be balancing all I do. Again thanks for these encouraging words. I needed this.

  • Nita Bourland says:

    Yes it is worth it!
    Never got to experience it as we are Childless not by choice but God has blessed us in helping overwhelming Moms, caregivers for the patents, hosting an International teenager and praying for others
    When your kids are raised you will still have them we don’t have family anymore but life still goes on.
    Don’t take your position as a Mom lightly. I am enjoying each moment this year with our teen from Korea.

  • Elaine says:

    As the mother of two grown children, I read this and smiled at the memories it brought back…all the energy of my kids, balancing working outside the home, the activities in church and school I was involved in, the prayers that tiny elves would appear in my home and clean it while I was gone. I smiled. These days I spend a lot of time telling fretful mommas to hug their children and tell them how much they love them. Discipline them with love. Be a parent, not their “best friend”–that role comes AFTER they are grown. But most of all, make time for them. I just spent 6 months in a Childrens Hospital watching my own baby girl spent 24/7 taking care of her newborn. The baby was born with rare defects and given less than a day to live. Thanks to excellent doctors and staff, many many prayers, and the fierce love and dedication of “little ones” parents, that one day stretched out to almost 6 months. Six months of love, tears, sadness and joy, and when the day came that our little one was called home, it was with the knuwledge that he loved and was loved every moment of his life. Momma, when you get tired, frustrated and want to throw in the towel just look at your healthy energetic baby child and thank God for it all.

  • Terri Allison says:

    That was lovely. You know why some grandmas dress to the nines and get their hair and nails done? It’s later :) Have a blessed day with your kids. They grow up so fast!

  • […] To the Momma at Chick-Fil-A :: If you’re momma to littles – or know someone who is – let this be encouragement for your heart. […]

  • Lori says:

    Thank you. Sometimes it’s just nice to know, it’s not just me.

  • Kristee says:

    I honestly thought you saw me at Chick-Fil-A!!! Although you would have been very generous with your compliments LOL. My boys are now 3 and 4 and I feel like I’ve drained my batteries and need recharging every few hours. I try so hard to live in the moment and enjoy all the small things, but it’s really hard when your kids are jumping up and down in their seats, not eating, squealing and fighting over the meal toys and reaching over to other tables to make their (already obvious) presence known. I have very happy, outgoing, loving little boys, so I know I’m doing something right. But I feel like I’m on them constantly to calm down and take it down a notch. It’s mentally exhausting. I feel eyes of judgement on me all the time. Perhaps I am paranoid. But when your parents are parenting coaches, you feel an obligation to have great kids. And I do! They just drive me up the wall as they grin back at me with those cute little faces. I know I’ll miss that. Thanks for this post. It is the way I hope people will be towards me as I struggle with keeping my boys in check.

  • Marisol Serrano says:

    Omg this is so my life i have a 1,2, and 3 year old and it’s really hectic when I have no help but thanks for the post as now I know I am not the only one lol

  • Brian says:

    I was a single dad for many years, starting just after my son’s first birthday. There was the production of getting him and his diaper bag, favored toys, blankets, etc. out the door when we wanted to go to Gramma’s house (or anywhere else). The loading into the stroller for that evening walk that was always the best way to get him to sleep. Going somewhere when he was tired and running on just his refusal to go to sleep, and estimating how many times the tires would turn before he was out like a light. It was work, but I remember those days with extreme fondness. Yes, I miss them, but when I look at the man he has become 30 years later, I am so proud of him.

    Hang in there moms and dads. It is SO worth it.

  • Tiffany says:

    I absolutely love this! It couldn’t be more true. Its hard at times but when I hear “I love you mom” and my 12 month old leans over and kisses me its all worth it.

  • Krista says:

    Oh how I miss those days at times, but having both my adult kids out & on their own it has made us closer, especially when they just call to talk about “nothing”. While at times it doesn’t feel it, the struggle of the early years is very worth it, it’s a honor to raise kids, cherish it, in a blink of an eye it’ll be over.

  • Angie Hott says:

    This is a perfect post! I especially recall the times I would color my roots “later!” I finally gave up and just grew it all out. At 44 with 4 children (one only 4 years old)…I was completely white.
    Thanks for your sweet words!

  • BB says:

    I love this. There are so many days where I’ve lost myself but seriously I wouldn’t trade it for a second. It actually chokes me up. I love my babies even when I can’t stand them. It’s the most unbelievable job. Mundane a lot but guess what I am raising my babies to be good people (hopefully), thoughtful of others, polite, and giving. I see myself in them, which is sometimes a wake up to do better. What’s so hard is the judging of myself that I’m not doing enough or not doing is well enough. Sometimes I have to give myself a break and other days I need to push through it. But I love my freaking job!!! I’m there mom and that’s all I ever wanted to be!!

  • Theresa says:

    Ok. Now I’m crying. So well worded!!

  • Karla says:

    You know this made me smile because it’s so true. My kids are 4 and 6 and I am in school now after 8yrs overseas and finally back stateside. It is my later. I am now just now finding time for myself and get my own identity back. As much as I love what I am doing now, I can’t help but MISS those times. I see new moms out there and just stare in awe because I miss it and how I cherished every moment and I am so BLESSED to have spent my time home with them. God Bless!

  • Amanda says:

    So you’re saying women shouldn’t spend any time on themselves, that it’s a badge of honor to not eat, shower, or get something for herself?! I think that’s the opposite of what moms should be doing. My mom always took time for herself and we learned at an early age that we wait on mom, she doesn’t wait on us. We learned to respect her instead of controlling her entire day. And because of this, I am a patient, kind, successful business owner who hopes to always be that type of mom to my kids. Over-catering to our kids makes them spoiled and expectant that they always come first. The world just doesn’t work that way.

  • Taylor Hildebrand says:

    hi! I know this might seem weird but I was wondering if that is you is the picture, it honestly looks identical to my best friend, Shandee! We have been sitting around all morning trying to decide if it was actually her. If it is not you could you give us some insight as to where that photo came from? Thanks for your time!

    Have a great day,
    Taylor Hildebrand

  • Anne-Marie Wells says:

    I am also a mother of three. They have all grown into amazing adults. I too was a wrangler of children. I did without things for myself so they could have what they needed, not always what they wanted. I always tell people that my children are my breath. In August of 2013, my youngest son left for Army basic training. He was injured and had to have reconstructive surgery on his left leg. I wasn’t able to be there. The surgery failed and he has had to live in constant pain for 8 months. I wasn’t allowed to see him. Last night, we welcomed him home. Thirty members of our family and friends joined us. It feels amazing to be able to take a deep breath again. All of my children slept under my roof last night. I am truly blessed.

  • Amanda Lemke says:

    I needed this today….I am sitting here fighting a cold, getting things ready for my Kindergarten class (I am a teacher), and dealing with a potty training 20 month old highly active little girl, Mia.
    My husband and 7 year old son Reece are out volunteering at church today.
    There is a little bit of calm…and then a storm (Mia’s demands) every 5 minutes or so. Just started screaming her ABC’s….and I am laughing.
    However, I have been there…trying to get my daughter into the car seat she has loathed since birth. Now, 20 months old she screams and kicks. I cautiously look around the parking lot of the grocery store every time this happens because someone might be watching me force my daughter into her safety seat…for her own safety!
    I feel joy almost daily with my family, but those moments of complete exhaustion happen more.
    I don’t leave the house without make up, so I am a bit different than this lady at Chic-fil-A, but my clothes might not match and my hair is definitely not done. LOL But I see moms of older kids and think, one day I will look cute and put together like them…we’ll see. :)

  • Katherine G says:

    This is a great post! I so remember those days. I sometimes find myself going down memory lane when I see moms with young kids doing it. I think it is great that you gave her some recognition.

  • Trish says:

    This was great. I’ve been there- feels like a lifetime ago. Now that my kids are 18. &. 21, my “later” has finally arrived. But to tell the truth, I miss the chaotic times when I didn’t have time for myself and my kids needed me every moment of the day, and sometimes the nights! They grow up way too fast so enjoy every crazy moment when you feel like you don’t have a second for yourself before you know it time will slow to life jarring halt and those “later” moments you wished for will become sad and lonely times where you wish you has a kid tugging at you saying” mommy, mommy, mommy…!”

  • Kim says:

    This has a nice thought to it but isn’t it kind of crazy to see someone struggling through a struggle that you know all to well and just sit there and not help because you are in the middle of your own lunchtime adventure?

  • Karen says:

    Time is so fleeting. Just ‘yesterday’ I was a mother with an infant and toddler and now I stand at my front door waving as my ‘babies’ drive down the driveway to their lives and futures. If only I had paused, laughed more…smiled more at all that chaos of backseat bickering, remote control disagreements, and bedroom territorial disputes. I thought those moments would never end and now I long for their return. These days I see women with screaming babies, frustration on their faces, and I smile. I let them know that as mothers, we’ve all been there and given the chance I’d be back there once more. Now, I patiently wait for grandchildren…to spoil with cake for breakfast, long days in the park, and smiles/laughter at moments that will pass far to quickly.

    Becky, you write beautifully. Thank you for you observational skills and the wonderful ways you share them with others.

  • Kathie says:

    Just wandering around blog-land this morning and found myself here and I have for sure enjoyed visiting. I am many years beyond the times you described but I do remember them and I smile – now. :)
    I am encouraged and blessed to find another young woman sharing her gifts with others! Thank you. Keep up the good work – there is a world of woman out there needing good words! You are wise beyond your years. GOD is good! Blessings!!

  • edgar chapman jr says:

    Well I was a single dad at one time and I was just like that alot, so I can actually relate and say this was a great article. I think women are over looked alot and I truely see the drama they all go through and I am always stay on the ladies side!!! Thanks Edgar Chapman Jr.

  • SGT B says:

    Dear Mom,

    Hi, you don’t know me, but I’m the guy that was sitting off to the side, watching you and your kids during my lunch break. I watched you getting your kids settled in, watched you doing your “Mom” thing, all those little acts of self-sacrifice that seem to come with the job, and you do them without missing a beat.
    I’ve got three kids too, and when I take them out when my wife needs a break, it’s semi-controlled chaos. I tell you, I am amazed at your ability to be the domestic goddess, so I bought a bouquet of flowers on the way home, and gave them to my wife, with a huge hug, and I thanked her for being, well, a Mom, because it’s a tough job, and she does it everyday.
    So, you Moms, on behalf of all of us Dads (because while any boy can be a father, it takes a real man to be a Dad), I want to tell say:
    I love you. You are beautiful. You are strong. The kids and I really don’t know how good we have it. There is no way I could ever put it all together as well as you can, and I need to tell you more often how much I appreciate everything that you do.

    I’ll pick something up for dinner on my way home…

  • Alicia says:

    beautiful and true! every thing will come later

  • carolyn d says:

    Wonderful post. I’ve often seen young mothers, so frazzled, and I remember and I smile or say a kind word. Now that mine are almost college age, I agree, wholeheartedly, that it is, indeed, worth it.

  • Rhonda says:

    Loved your Mom at Chic FIL a. I’m now 60 years old but that was me about 25 years ago. I remember one night trying to get the boys ages 4 and 6 fed supper and before I could sit down to eat they were finished and wanted me to color with them before they had to go to bed and I said yes because I could eat later. The next day my youngest son died unexpectedly. You don’t always have another chance for those everyday moments. I’ve never taken for granted that I’ll have “later” or “tomorrow” when it comes to those I love.

  • Sallie says:

    This is my first experience reading your blog. I love how you embraced (and let all mothers in these shoes) the selflessness of this mom. I am years from this experience but would go back in a heartbeat.

  • Sarah Craven says:

    This was just beautiful. Beautiful sentiment – beautiful writing!

  • Me says:

    Sigh…well most of the mommies i know cannot afford Chick-Fil-A so they are at home making peanut butter and jelly for all of their sweet children. This mom is blessed she can go out and have a break in her day, and someone else to make lunch for her family.

  • misty says:

    Isn’t it great that we have the opportunity to make these sacrifices for these beautiful children. We are SO blessed!!

  • Jessica says:

    I stumbled acrss this story on FB today. I could be reading this about myself.. I am a mother to an 8 year old daughter, a 5 year old step-daughter, and 9 month old twin girls. I feel like any time I leave home just getting into my vehicle without 5 trips back inside forgotten items is an accomplishment. I am often by myself since my husband works on the road and is gone for weeks at a time. I often find myself wearing old jeans and a shirt covered in drool or spit or cookie or the latest new food my girls have discovered. Makeup is reserved for very special occasions and times when my girls are with grandparents. The hairdos I spend time on are for the girls…Mine comes later. (Probably another 8 to 10 years.) Scarves, earrings, necklaces, and anything else dangly and breakable are stored in boxes in my closet for after the pull everything stage. No need even taking up closet or counter space for that stuff right now. It is an endless trip back to the counter or three trips to the bathroom every where we go. (Nobody has to go at the same time.) On top of that I get to answer every stranger walking by wanting to know “Are they twins?” “A girl and a boy?” “How old?” “What are their names?” I love all 4 of my girls and even though each trip out of the house is a huge hassle, I know to enjoy what I can, worry less, and be silly with them. My 8 year old is already growing out of the play with mommy stage. They dont stay little long.

  • Audrey says:

    This brought tears to my eyes. Was the perfect message to the chick fil a mom and all of us other moms who are completely over whelmed in chaos at times. I am expecting my second at the end of march and I am paranoid of the added chaos my lil bundle will bring but I am welcoming it 100% open arms. It makes me so mad to hear & see people ridiculing mothers (parents) for their children. They are children! Learning about the world and controling their emotions. It’s a wonderful feeling when a sweet soul takes the time to compliment a mother in an overwhelming circumstance. Gives us that added boost of confidence & pride if only for a moment before chaos kicks back in. Thank you for this wonderful read <3

  • Melissa says:

    This reminded me of when I was in line at Chik-fil-a with my son in my arms (he’s now 15), and he turned to me and kissed me on the cheek. It was one of those days where you stop at the food court in the mall to grab something to eat that your child can eat in the car while you try to finish up your errands before naptime. It was just what I needed that day!

  • Dana Mislin- Langa says:

    That was a great read! I really enjoy your posts! So well written!

  • Malia says:

    Great post, I can definitely relate :-)

  • Carl carter says:

    I know the feeling all to well do these things apply if your a single father of two under the age of two and have them 24/7 365.

  • Stacey says:

    So well said!

  • Miki says:

    Why wouldn’t she send her kids into the play area, grab a table next to it and eat her food as well as their delicious, uneaten nuggets. You’d think she’d learn after the first kid, lol.

  • I’m living in the “later”. It’s highly overrated. Yes, I enjoy the quiet and a tidier home at times. But how my husband and I miss our busy, chattering little ones (7 of them).
    That was the time, as hard as it was, when I really felt important, needed, valued!
    I always try to help struggling young moms when I can, without looking like a stalker! 😀

  • James Willis says:

    I’m a father but your still right they are worth it. I find myself doing similar things sometimes with those around me.

  • Marie Avila says:

    Wow that was beautiful. Made me cry. As a mom of an 11, 9, 8, 3 year old and 8month old baby, I’ve been that woman. But gotta say shame shame she shouldn’t be feeding her kids chick a filet or any fast food…. But I know the woman and place are metaphors for all that we as mothers do and go through. All and all this was BEAUTIFUL

  • Angela Krout says:

    Wonderful story and I remember all the times when my 4 kids were little. We do push ourselves to the side but worth every minute. Especially when we get the big hug and kiss from one of them covered in baby food or spaghetti, When we hear the words ” I love you mommy” or in the words of my second child ” I love you Marmay” for the first time or the 50th time it fills our hearts and makes eating cold food, drinking ice tea with floaties in it or walking around with snot on our sleeve from wiping a nose because we have no tissue no big deal. lol Now when I get up in the morning and pick out my clothes, take a shower and sit down with my cup of coffee I miss those days tremendously. My middle daughter is 28 now and still calls me marmay, my 3rd daughter calls me madray, my oldest and the baby call me mom and I cherish every name because I know they love me just as I love them.So yes I notice these moms too and want to say great job also.Even though my kids are all grown I would still do anything within my power they ask me to do.

  • julie says:

    Thanks for your recognition…this was basically me today. It’s a blessing to be noticed and commended rather than judged!

  • Andi says:

    Its so true, My baby is grown now and out on his own. Sometimes, maybe a lot of the time I miss those days when he needed me. He is so independent now. If I could say something to the young moms out there I would say, cherish those days with sticky finger children, they will be gone before you know it.

  • Chamaine says:

    I have often found myself thinking these same things and praying for the sweet Mommas I see when I’m out and about with my own rugrats. You put it so beautifully though and you so touched my heart. Thank you for this post and the reminder that sometimes, it’s good to speak up and tell someone that you see them and they’re doing a good job. I know it would make my day! :)

  • Katie Foster says:

    Hi-
    Thanks so much for this guidance. My husband and I have only been married for one year. We want so much to have children.. I am 30 and he is 38. We hope God blesses us with little ones some day.
    When he does, I will remember your words.
    God bless you
    Katie

  • Stephenie says:

    As I’m laying here in bed i read this blog and cry quietly to myself. It is awesome to be recognized once in a while as a strong mother. I am about to start my second trimester with my second child and i couldn’t be more terrified to start over. My son is 6 now so it’s like a brand new beginning. Being a mother is one of the greatest accomplishments i can think of that I’ve ever done in my life. Kudos to hard working mom’s and dad’s out there.

  • Taylor says:

    My first thought: Oh my gosh. Yep, I definitely don’t want kids.
    My second thought: Why on earth would anyone want to live like this? It seems awful!
    My third thought: I’m really glad that there are other women who exist that want kids and this life. They’re really awesome for being about that life, because if the world was made up of people like me, the human race would cease to exist.

  • April says:

    Trust me when I say to you, the cute momma at Chick-Fil-A who bothered to put on pretty shoes, the one whose hair is tumbling from a clippy but still looks messy chic, the one with the short unpolished nails and the unshaven legs covered with trendy dark jeans, one day when those lovey little sweet smelling wide eyed dears are 22, 20 and, 12, you will miss that day you didn’t have time for yourself. But I guarantee you will never miss the uneaten food, the untaken baths, the unread books, the unearned money, or the lost sleep.
    Listen to the above advice, I know it to be true.

  • Kelly says:

    I am so sick of these blog posts about how “moms don’t have enough time to eat/shower/think/walk/talk”. As a mother of 2 I am appalled at how other mothers think it’s perfectly ok to let their children run their lives, decide when to eat, what to eat, when to play, when to eat, sleep, take a shit for Christ sake. Take control of your lives! Be a parent who TEACHES thier children, not let them RUN you. This way of like is not ok, it’s disturbing.

  • Sheila says:

    it’s worth it. Thank you for your sweet post. I am a mama of 5 my oldest is 11 and my youngest is 5 months. They are my world. Everyday has challenges, or in my case a 2 yr old. But I have learned to relax and like you say, my later will come and I will miss my remember when. Much love to your and all the moms out there just trying to get through today. It is worth it.

  • Jenny says:

    I just about cried reading this. It is so me. I’m a mom of 7… 17 yrs to 7 mos. I haven’t had a meal/drink/pillow to myself in 17 yrs. I’m always saying I need this or that but I never get because my son needs his class ring or my daughter needs shoes. I’m always the last to eat because I’m making sure everyone else has food and drink and keeping my 3 yr old from stealing my 2 yr old’s food. Thank you. It’s nice to know there are others out there. And YES it is all worth it.

  • Debra Knight says:

    I’ve so been there…….many times…..many years ago. Looking back, all my memories are joyous and NOT stressful but I know with 3 boys I must have been tired and stressed. Like with childbirth, time fades those memories where all you remember is how much fun it was. Enjoy every wild and crazy moment, suck every minute out of every day. I would go back to when my boys were 7, 5 and newborn in a flash but I can’t so instead I cherish my memories and love my time with my 19, 24 & 26 year old sons and one daughter-in-love making new memories and waiting on a new generation to start all over again.

  • David Wilkinson says:

    I love this, its beautiful, but it still irks me to no end. Women aren’t the only ones that do this exact same thing. I have three children of my own, and do nigh on the same things on a regular basis. I love them to death.

  • Jessica Hyde says:

    to the mom at chic fil a story

    Boy, have I been overwhelmed lately and did not know how I was gonna continue the role of Superman, because I’m not Superman, but God blessed me with two beautiful kids 7yr old and almost 5month…. And I can help but think back to God never puts more on us than we can handle… And although I bust my hiney at work standing all day long with a horrible back, I wouldn’t take NOTHING for my babies! What a nice reminder you have given me, and I am blessed to be called their mommy!!!!
    Thank you,
    Jessica Hyde

  • Heather Salazar says:

    So sweet and neat thank you for this post!

  • Jeanne Garber says:

    My mom linked this post to my fb page, and as I sat here reading it I could see myself so clearly. It is nice to know that there are a few people out there who notice and understand the engulfing world that little people pull mommy into. Someday it will be my turn again…

  • Jackie says:

    You know who else can wait?? The kids. They CAN play quietly or watch a show if you need a little extra sleep. They CAN eat all their food and sit quietly for a few minutes while you eat. Teaching children to wait for others, ESPECIALLY their mother is something that is RARELY taught. My kids are well fed, happy and GREAT kids. Just watched for the past week by my in-laws, we were told our girls are, Amazing and so polite. Children can wait. They are the most important people in our world, but even sometimes CEO’s of multi billion corporations need to go to the bathroom alone. 😉

  • Loude Dobad says:

    I saw you at Chik-fil-a with your children making excellent and heart warming food choices. I think you are a superhero for going to a fast food restaurant with your children, every part of the place is tailor maid to make your experience pleasurable. Despite this I know you run into difficulties such as pulling a wallet out of a diaper bag, lord knows why you didn’t go through the drive through. It is truly tragic that you have children and must take care of them. When I saw the 17 year old behind the counter who is working their first job hand you your drink holder with three grain silo sized corn syrup filled carbonated beverages and you managed to get it all the way from the counter to the table 15 feet away without spilling any I thought it was one of the greatest accomplishments in the history of the world. Damn what a great mom. Clearly you learned from the greatest such as Helen Keller, Elizabeth Blackwell, and Joan of Arc. I would have helped but then I wouldn’t have been able to write a blog post that romanticized the mundane life of ordinary mothers. Feel my tongue up your ass yet?

    I remember when I was like you, young, narcissistic, entitled, ignorant but I don’t mean to patronize you.

    I am nostalgic about it. I wish I was still pretty. You looked terrible. You were going out with your children to a fast food restaurant and I know your wanted to paint your face and select your most stunning outfit for the occasion but being a mom means sacrificing a few things.

    I have braved the world without makeup, parenting Au Naturale. It is difficult, I always want to be the prettiest woman in the room just like you but my children must come first.

    Don’t worry – the kids will be in bed by 8:30 and we can watch Mom on CBS.

    When you got to the table with the young children who have poor motor skills it was an effort for you to clean up after all of their blunders. After all they are your responsibility. I am surprised that the staff at the restaurant didn’t clean up the spilled drink on your table caused by your oldest.

    Then after they prepared your extremely unhealthy meal and brought it to you warm you had to contend with opening single serving ketchup packets. Hard work, we all know.

    Then when the needy little beasts finally eased up a little and you thought you were about to eat your own factory farm raised antibiotic infused chicken breast they wanted to use the equipment that was designated for them. Their focus couldn’t be more inward.

    Don’t worry. It is highly likely you are overweight.

    It is really hard being a mother living in a westernized country.

    The kids get up and ask for breakfast because they can’t make it themselves and you begrudgingly give them fruit loops.
    The baby shat all over themselves and therefore needs a bath? I’ll feed my fashion sense later.

    We’ll doll ourselves up later. We’ll look hot again, later.

    You have to pee but can’t until you get home because you are in charge of two infants, poor you.

    You took a baby grocery shopping. Why?

    It will be your turn soon, you’ll be able to feed your ego.

    When you bagged up those chicken nuggets for later I thought, “It’s all worth it.”

    All the time and effort that we spend being mommy. All the completely ordinary moments that we make out to be so overwhelming to beat back our own insecurity. They are worth it.

    All these sacrifices that you make may seem to go unseen but I see. I want you to know that I see. Even with all the smoke and mirrors I know what is going on. What we do is important, meaningful and worth it. Well, when people are watching.

  • Tracy Underwood says:

    As a mother of 4 now young adult sons, I remember those crazy busy fabulous days. However I always made the effort to get the boys to understand they needed to wait for me to finish food, or take care of the basics. It shouldn’t be a martyrdom situation. Today my sons respect others needs and desires as well as their own because they were taught to be patient and that sometimes they had to wait. I believe too much emphasis is placed on catering to our children’s every need and whim instantly and they are growing up with a sense of entitlement and unrealistic expectations. The disillusion of a childhood filled with parents killing themselves for their kids sets them up for a real world where no one is going to drop everything for them and put all on hold to meet their needs. Parenting is wonderful and difficult and I wish I could go back and do it all over again. But I still would not change my stance on creating realistic boundaries to protect my health and sanity while rearing quality youngsters!

  • Brenda says:

    This is EXACTLY why I never had children…

  • kim clements says:

    Love this

  • Julie says:

    So very true! We put ourselves on hold to give everything to our sweet darlings! So worth the longing for a shower and the ability to sit down :)

  • Amy G says:

    Wow. I really REALLY needed someone to see me this week.
    Thank you.

  • Dee says:

    I LOVE this! I have been “later-ing” for 23 years now. Even with my youngest at just over 12 years old, I still continue to later myself in many ways. Like Amy said, I MISS having the older two to take care of and cherish every call & every time they want “mom” to visit – no matter the reason.

    I have learned, though, in the last few years, that there are things we can’t “later” – because if we don’t take care of ourselves, we do a disservice to our children. Much of it – the makeup, the perfect hair, etc – is not consequential. However, some of it – eating later, sleeping later, etc…will eventually take a toll on our health which sacrifices our ability to care for our LO’s as well as we are truly able to. 😉

    So, for all the moms with true LO’s (I feel like my 12 year old isn’t really “little” now – although I would LOVE her to be!) who are reading this, I sure hope you block out some time – SOMEHOW – to take care of you. It helps you be more effective as mom and any “position” you find yourself filling. It simply takes realizing what’s really important for you to be the best & most effective and make sure you figure out how to get that worked in….

  • lynn says:

    Oh wow, this was me yesterday only at a crowded doughnut shop at 8am with my 3 boys (1,2 and 8) because I wanted to get out of the house and treat the kids to a doughnut that they’ve been asking for (for weeks) and I had to go to the grocery store for milk anyway. I sacrificed my own shower and just sprayed dry shampoo in my hair, brushed it and applied mascara. The kids however were all groomed. I was hoping to beat the rush getting there at 8, but it was crowded. As I pulled up I noticed someone leaving one of the only 5 booths in the shop. I told my oldest to jump out of the car while I found a parking spot and save it. He did, but than I realized my extra set of hands were gone and it was me and 2 babies, a starbucks coffee, diaper bag and one stroller (a stroller that sucks and doesn’t move easily). One baby in the stroller and the 2 year old who no longer wants help doing anything including holding my hand while in the street, so before we got in the shop the trouble had already started and I was thinking why did I put myself in this situation. I managed to get through the door and tell my 2 year old to find his older brother which thankfully he did. No booster seats and there was a little round table 12″ from our table so no room for a stroller. Trying to get my oldest to hold the one year old while I folded the stroller and put it under the table. Ordering doughnuts was a whole other stress as obviously they can’t make up their minds. Walking back to the table my one year old who was full from a bottle of milk on the way there threw up from all the bouncing around… all over the table, me and himself. I was defeated. I hoped nobody noticed as I wiped it down with a wet wipe and held him in my lap while they all (but me as I was cleaning spills and crumbs and holding a baby) chowed down on doughnuts. People looked at me like I had 3 heads. Like they feel sorry for me when I take them out. They were actually good though, no fits, and my 8 and 2 year old used their manners saying please and thank you to the cashier which in my mind says I’m doing something right, people can hear that, they can hear how I’ve taught them to use manners. I was given a compliment by an old man sitting across from me before I left and it was much appreciated and welcomed. Most importantly the kids had fun and were happy and I kept a promise that I had made to take them “soon”. Sometimes they’re good and it’s a breeze, but mostly its complete chaos. I mostly hold out to do any errands until my husband who works 14 hour rotating night and day shifts at a refinery is off, or I have a sitter. I do wish time would move faster some days when the babies refuse a nap and the tantrums outnumber the good times, but I try to keep positive and focus my attention on all of them equally and know one day they will be grown and I’ll miss the baby days or the endless hours my oldest will talk of superheros or movies. However with all the energy I use on the kids I am the same weight I was when I was 17… 16 years later. So hey.. good exercise!

  • Jennifer Wilkinson says:

    Thank you for what you do. We need this.
    Keep it up, please.

  • Maree Dawkins says:

    I have been where you are now I am on the other side. It was so worth it. I now have two devoted daughters and two granddaughters who love their nana. I now have all the time in the world for me. I’m so glad I took the time to be with my children when they were growing up. You can’t go back.Every minute pays big dividends!

  • John says:

    And then you turn around and your baby boy is 16 and driving off to who knows where. When you wake up the next day, he’s 18 and packing everything he owns in his andvyour truck to go to college. And before you know it, he’s ready to graduate, start his career and his own family.

    Drink it in! Drink deeply like its the first cool water you’ve had on an all day hike. Enjoy every sloppy moment because when they are gone, they are gone and you’d give anything to be annoyed again.

  • Jennifer says:

    Thank you. As a new mom this was needed to be read by me.

  • Kelsey says:

    I just have one and she’s only five months, but I am starting to feel what this is. Having a baby and a diaper bag and trying to do other things all at the same time. Mothers learn skills and to multi-task. We are the best at that. But all the times I go out of the house with my hair looking a hot mess is well worth it.

  • Amanda says:

    Beautiful – absolutely beautiful. I’m not a mom yet, but this made me wish I were. Thank you for the sacrifices you all make. Being a mom is the most difficult, but most important job in the world. I’m convinced of it!

  • John says:

    My daughters go to chick-fil -a often with 6 kids! Typical day

  • Darla Noble says:

    I’ve been a stay at home mom and now nanna since 1982. I’ve never NOT had my kids and/or grandkids to care for. We didn’t have a lot of money. We never went on vacations. We didn’t even have cable. But we had lots of fun, craziness, noise, arguments, games, spills, laughs, playdough and all the other things we moms fill our days with. Take it from me-someone who has years of experience…there will be days when you wonder if and why a lot of things, but you never have to ask yourself if you are doing the right thing, because you ARE.

  • Tom Graveman says:

    I commend you a great deal but could you put your child on a surface where our food is served? I don’t know what is in that diaper and neither did you. I am sorry but it is just not very clean.

  • Jessica Toler says:

    I am her, the woman you’re writing. Thank you! I’m in tears! Why, for a moment, did I feel like I’m the only one? Just me and my three babies, always, feels lonely. My husband works hard for us. I hope I’m doing good with our family also. Thanks for noticing me, all of me, and not just how tired or old I look. My spirit truly needed it.

  • Alison says:

    I am a bit disturbed by this post. You my fellow Mom posted a selfie which in all do respect is super cute! Why did you have to say up until you seen this other woman’s beautiful motherly face because you obviously did the head to toe look in which unfortunately most woman do naturally for some ungodly reason, that above her scarf revealed tired eyes. The fact is according to your so called “caring” post, that woman felt great about herself because she did dress awesome. So awesome you had to post a cute post of yourself! It’s unfortunate that we as woman and mothers live in a society where other woman are telling us it’s okay when They think we are having a bad day, hey here’s a thought… We are feeling our best! You should be ashamed for judging this beautiful woman to make your self feel like you have been in her shoes. You targeted her face, the most vulnerable piece of our being. That day she felt and was beautiful and so did you hence your adorable selfie.

  • John says:

    Just too bad that you couldn’t write these stories about parents not just one gender of parent. Like only moms go through this struggle?

  • Vickie says:

    I told my 26 year old the other day, I wished I would have had more
    Kids. She said “really mom” I said “yes I love my 3 and wished I still had some at home”.

  • […] moms, we should understand that raising our kids means celebrating the important work we […]

  • Theresa says:

    ok. I am crying burning tears after I read the last paragraph. Your words always speak to me. I’m a Mom of two boys under two who never sleep. Thanks. I think I can make it through the day now.

  • Jennifer says:

    Thank you, this was confirmation for me today. My husband and I made the decision to homeschool our two children which means my free time just flew out the window! As I was thinking about how this decision is going change all of that and I will be with the kids all the time, concern was overcome with love and I realized they will grow up, get married and have families of their own. Then I will have more free time than I will know what to do with! So whatever it was that I was doing with my time before is nowhere near the importance of giving our unselfish love.

  • Raechelle says:

    This absolutely dropped me. (to my knees) So beautiful. With five kids, two toddlers and three teens… Thank you for this. Chagrin, and tears.

  • Tami Page says:

    Hey I’m now a grandma with 4 grands and had 4 kids and it still doesn’t change much! Try to take care of yourself as much as possible because no one else will!

  • Sabrina says:

    Thank you so much for your kind words to all us mommies out there. They really hit home today. That seems to be my life everyday, cold food or I eaten good just to take care of my little ones. Trying to make it seem like I care about my appearance with the little ones demands. It is nice to hear others notice and appreciate the sacrifice we are making to raise our little miracles.

  • Jaqi says:

    What a great article! As a mother of three and “Gammaw” of six, I have definitely been there.You are doing a great service for young mothers by telling them these truths. They know it, but they need to hear it ! We all need affirmation from each other. Keep up the good work !

  • mike says:

    Maybe life would be easier and you would manage it better if you fed your kids healthful meals at home rather than dragging them out to eat fast food. And setting the baby on the counter? Ick. Glad I never eat at this disgusting place.

  • Jaime Evans says:

    Couldn’t be more true!! One day they won’t need our help so much or won’t be interested in being with me half us much. So for right now, I will be okay with a quick shower and 2 bites of a cold dinner so I will get all the extra snuggles!

  • Tammy Davis says:

    Yes, and yes. It is all worth it. The waiting. The loving. The no make-up days and sleeples nights it’s all worth it. Being the mom of six kids and one called home to glory suddenly at 17. I want to shout to you all. It’s worth it. Love it. Embrace it. Don’t fight it. Love it. Lean into the sleepless nights when they are in your arms. Lean into this time. Encourage one another on the long journey. Thank you for sharing.

  • 22&Beautiful says:

    And this is why I’ll never have kids.

  • […] read a blog post today about how we, as moms, often say we’ll do these (and many other things) later. I loved […]

  • Anjer says:

    I love these thoughts, but please tell her when you see her!!! I know you’re dealing with your own crazy, but somehow we, as mothers, have got to encourage each other. Tell me in person, I may bawl right in front of you, but only because I need to hear that its worth it. Yes, please continue to share your words here, so others may be encouraged also.

  • Gigetta says:

    I have never seen your blog before, but after reading this, I to have noticed these moms. My youngest is now 21, my oldest is 25 now. I do miss them being young, no would not go back again, but do dream of the day I will be a grandma and get to partake of some of the lovely chaos again.
    Young moms please, as hard as it is to believe, enjoy it now, for time goes by so fast.

  • Mead Vest says:

    My sister posted your To the Momma at Chick-fil-a blog on her Facebook page and so I read it. She has three young children right now and I am sure the post resonated with her completely.

    I don’t know how old your own kids are but let me encourage you from a mom of 7 kids aged 23-8 yrs old…It is so worth it! I was the one who walked in and people stared at me thinking I must runs day care. They watched me get into my 15 passenger van and more than once I was asked if I ran a school. I had women (and men) ask me what I do with them all. If there was a rude comment one could say to a mom I have heard it. Fortunately I have thick skin. About the time I was pregnant with my last one and completely fed up with rude and insulting remarks I vowed that the next time someone would say something like that to me I would reply with, “I am sorry you don’t like your children. I actually like mine and want to be with them.” Fortunately, God didn’t give me that opportunity because I would have been being rude right back and that isn’t right.

    But now that my oldest two are married (23 and 21) and successfully completely college (we also homeschooled) I can solidly testify that it is not only worth it…but they come back on occasion and tell you it was worth it. Of course they don’t come back and say “mom, all those dirty diapers you changed for me were so worth it and thank you” but they do come back and make comments on your sister’s Facebook page acknowledging their mother’s efforts and what the child in them thought was utterly ridiculous when they were 8 they now realize as a benefit to them that they didn’t realize until adulthood.

    It is worth it! Children are a gift from the Lord and anyone who doesn’t acknowledge that gift has missed the greatest treasure in all the earth.

  • Jodye Rudolph says:

    I know the feeling. I used to work in a daycare. I would sometimes take the kids with me to run erands. I would have up to seven kids under the age of four to deal with. Somehow I would manage to get everybody to a table and get lunch going. I enjoyed every moment spent with those kids. I learned about being a mom in a sense. These days, when I see women out with their children, I remember my time being pesudomom.

  • pat brown says:

    That woman is pure an simple my hero you have know idea, she is the most amazing woman she brings more strength with her than any one i know. Thank you for noticing her she needs much more . Most people would just be upset that she took the extra few min in line or the kids are being loud or whatever is happening at that moment an lets face it, it could be anything..lol… Thank you for this…

  • my7rhvn says:

    Just posted something like this on my Facebook page. I am a mom of 7 and most are grown. I just want to let you all know that everything you are sacrificing, all that you are going through is worth it. Your kids are worth it. I know you know that, or you wouldn’t be doing what your doing. But sometimes in the thick of it, you forget :). We didn’t have new or great stuff because I chose to stay home with my kids. But, it’s worth it all! Don’t give up!

  • Nicole says:

    This brought tears to my eyes. It’s as if it was me that was seen at Chick-fil-a. It’s so weird how one blog post can relate to so many people out there. Thank you, I needed this. I sometimes wonder if I’m doing too much for them and not enough for me, yada yada. But I don’t want to do less for them and I’m really quite happy doing what I do with and for them. I then sometimes wonder how the heck some of these women have their makeup and hair done all te time!!! And I think that’s not fair! I think of how much earlier I’d have to wake up just to do all that, and then I think, “I’ll just do my makeup on the weekends or when I go out with my husband”. It’s good to know I’m not solo on the “mom”-look.

  • Ruth says:

    Wonderful words too all the Mother , My God bless all.

  • Dan says:

    Ladies…don’t fret that you haven’t had the chance to put on your makeup or fix your hair just do. Beauty lies within and when a ‘real’ guy looks over and sees how much you love and sacrifice for your children, he sees a mom who is beautiful. Young men want their future wives to be what you are, married men with children love that their wives are just like you or wish that they were like you, and older men can look back and enjoy the fruits of their wives labor of love just like you and your husband will be able to do years from now. As hard as it may seem to be, still, enjoy this season of life because, believe it or not, you’ll miss it someday. The hard work you put in now will pay dividends in the future. And, you look beautiful doing it!

  • Kathryn says:

    grear writing!! thanks for sharing your gift !

  • Summer Ann says:

    This made me tear up. I’ve got a 6 month old son so I can totally relate to some of these things but I always feel like it’s worth it.

    Xoxo,
    Summer Ann
    http://www.simplysummerann.com

  • Diane H. says:

    I’m 51 and still waiting for later.
    LOL

  • Shannon Reyes says:

    So beautifully written. I’ve had those days and I have to be honest, I giggle now when I see those struggles sometimes. I giggle a sweet giggle because I know that “later” comes way too soon. When your “later” comes you’re going to be longing for those days of digging through your diaper bag with baby on the counter. Cooling off nuggets and sitting in the play place. Those days fly by and before you know it they are off in high school and college. Embrace those days and if you see me, in the corner with a little giggle, know it’s because I miss those days.

  • Renee says:

    This blog entry has been shared all over Facebook so I thought I would be encouraged after reading it. But I didn’t feel encouraged at all. Your critical perspective of this mom’s appearance completely took away from the message you’re trying to convey. Not every mom feels the need to wear makeup and not every mom feels that she needs to fix herself up. For me and several other moms I’ve spoken to who’ve read this entry, this came across as condescending, even though that was obviously not your intent. Personally, I wouldn’t appreciate a stranger writing about me saying that I “tried to make an effort,” with “makeup-less face surrounded by messy hair” and “we’ll fix ourselves up later.” That is judging a book by it’s cover and it takes away from the beautiful message that we as moms,dads, and guardians should uplift and encourage one another.

  • Becky VanGinkel says:

    This brought tears to my eyes… and was possibly one of my favorite blog posts every written. I am one of those Moms who always thinks to myself, “Later…”.. and sometimes I’m envious of my childless friends who always look like they stepped out of a magazine, and whose house always looks spotless.. but then I hear one of our 3 kids giggling and I know I wouldn’t trade our lives for anything <3

    babydjs_mom@yahoo.com

  • So beautiful. My little ones are past that age now but I remember those days well. Now when I see someone with small children it just feels different. It somehow feels like a memory of my own. Lots of work, but they grow SO fast.

  • Elaine says:

    Countless times I have felt the same way since my 5 children have grown up. Countless times I have said a silent prayer for the parent enmeshed in what might be considered ‘family chaos in a public place’ (do I hear airplanes,anyone?). You have more support than you imagine! For every raised eyebrow. every critical look, there are hundreds of us who wish we could tell you – relax and don’t worry so much about what others may think. What you do with love and caring will carry your kids through the tough times in life – even though you sometimes yell at them!
    You are more successful at parenting than you believe — I just wish there was a way to convince you of that.

  • […] this blog after she encountered a busy mom of young children at Chick-Fil-A. She wrote “To the Momma at Chick-Fil-A” as an encouragement to moms that their work and sacrifices do not go […]

  • Joni says:

    this made my day. I only have one child- he is 9 but I remember the days when I tried to do something and I put his needs before mine, that’s what a mom does. I just remember that one day he won’t need me (as much) as he does now and I’ll want those days back. Besides, like Pauline Harris in the movie “Anne of Avenlea” says “It’s nice to feel needed” when her mom needs her to stay with her instead of marrying someone.

  • dierdre says:

    Why not feed the children ( and herself) at home???

  • Joyce says:

    You are so right! You will have your days later when they are older which comes way too fast! I have 2 girls, one 23 and one 29. The youngest got married last May and I know that is the final thing that I am guaranteed. I hope to be part of their lives and the lives of my grandchildren but I have no idea where they may be or what they may be doing at that time. I miss them so much. I cried several days when she got married. The same when the oldest went off to college. Enjoy each moment of their lives in your arms. Each day that they change, no matter how obnoxious they may be. One of my girls live in the same town as we do, but my oldest lives 3 1/2 hours away. I talk to both of them as often as I can. Plus like me you have no guarantee for good health in the future or how much you can do. I have major back issues and hope that I can find someway to hold my grandchildren and lift them up for hugs and play vigorously. I don’t know from here where I will go health wise but I do know that my baby girls got the best part of me. I nurtured and treasured them on a daily basis. I thank God everyday for them and their dear husbands and my husband whom I love dearly. God loves!

  • jenna says:

    Thanks so very much. As I started reading, the tears started flowing. Thanks for seeing me today and realizing what a full plate I have. :)

  • Meowsha says:

    I loved this it made me smile in all the madness I have in my crazy world I really can say this was thoughtful from one mother to another

  • Krysty says:

    Love. All of it.

    You are fabulous!

  • Kaye Agtarap says:

    oh, O just discovered your blog. I feel like reading my own mommy diary. Mommy mode on always. Thank you for sharing these inspiring stories. :-)

  • Anne says:

    Loved this! It certainly brings back memories of raising our two children who are now young adults. Yes, you are exhausted and joyful at the same time.You are creating wonderful memories that you will cherish when they are grown and that will happen even faster than you can imagine. Enjoy every day and take lots of photos!

  • Candon says:

    Hello, I stumbled across your blog a few months ago. By pure fate I believe, God deffinately sent me here! I am a teen mom, 18 with a near 2 year old to be exact. Currently engaged to his father, for three years now, ha. Long story short, I love everything about your blog. It is daily read for me and help so much in my life and relationship. Helps me see clearly and helps me find my words to my fiance and the “right” words to pray. Thank you so much for you and your gift!!!

  • Kristen Nicoladis says:

    Great article !! I can totally relate !

  • Jena Ingle says:

    I cried reading this because it’s so beautifully true. Sometimes we just need that one (outside) person to recognize our efforts. It truly is ALL worth it.

    Thank you for writing this.

  • Sherrie Price says:

    My niece had your blog tagged on her Facebook page. I am 66 yrs old and have been a Mom for 41 yrs. He is married and lives 3 states away. But I’m still a Mom. My 2 brothers have 13 grandchildren between them, aged 16 to 3. Even though I am their great Aunt I feel more like a grandmother. My son does not plan on having any children so these kids are my surrogate grandchildren. My nieces are just like you and the Mom you saw in that restaurant. They juggle homemaking, school, sports, scouts, and a lot more in between all that. They are great Mothers and I am proud of them. My Mother was a wonderful example for them to follow. They have all said they want to be like her. She is in Heaven but I believe she sees them and is proud. Thank you for your blog, I look forward to getting updates.

  • christina says:

    This was absolutely perfect in every way.i love how motherhood connects so many of us, even if our paths have never crossed. Thank you for your words, they were needed today.

  • crystal says:

    so needed to hear this today. this is true. it’s worth it – even if it’s later.

  • Glad to hear from another grandma going through the circuit again. And, even though it is because something went horribly wrong, you still build the roadway on the stairs and make the dinosaurs talk for this second batch. It isn’t even your will to do it. It is some “grace” that comes from “somewhere”.

  • Kelsey says:

    I saw this shared on my Newsfeed last year when I had just find out I was pregnant and had no idea what was in store for me. A year later I see it in my “memories” and it is even more beautiful to me now than the first day I read it. After being a single mother since she was about 6 weeks old, I constantly have to remind myself that these days go so fast and she won’t need me this much forever (but I know she’ll always need me). Although exhausting, I cherish all the giggles, goofy smiles, spills, and tantrums.

    So thank you for this. Thank you for reminding us that some recognize what we’re going through and understands!

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