The Wife Who Just Needed a Hug – But NOT Right Away Thursday, November 12th, 2015
When my husband has been at work all day, I happen to stay at home with the kids. I know this isn’t the situation for all families. I know that not every woman who has a child stays at home. There are plenty of other ways that families operate. But in our family, I get to stay home and work from here. It’s just our unique situation.
But the thing is, while I am at home with my three small people ages 5, 4, 1, I get touched a lot. I pick up the baby to get him out of his crib. I hug my older two. I carry the baby. I carry my four year old. My five year old wants to sit in my lap. They climb on me. They wrestle me. They are all over me.
(All before my five year old and four year old go to school for part of the day.)
This does not include all of the hanging on me that occurs between noon and the moment my husband arrives home from work.
But the truth is, when my husband comes home… when I see his truck pull up in front of our house and he comes walking in the door, I just want to be off duty. I want to go to my room and lay in the middle of my bed with no one touching me. There’s this line from a movie where the wife says to her husband,
“There are times when I’ve just thought about, on my worst day, just, you know, leaving our house and going someplace. Like checking into a hotel and just being in a quiet room by myself. Just sitting in a quiet air-conditioned room, sitting down, eating my lunch with no one touching me, drinking a Diet Sprite, by myself.”
I get it. I just want to have some space too, but truthfully, most days what I really need is a hug. I need my husband to wrap me in his arms and whisper not just encouragement – but hope. I need him to hold me like he did when we were dating and say something that makes me ugly cry… like, “I got this. Why don’t you go lay down.”
So, sweet husband of mine, don’t stop hugging me, don’t stop reaching out for me… just give me a few minutes alone and a little understanding of why I might need a little space.