Every year, you think it will be easier. You think that the last 365 days have prepared you to face it. You know that it is coming. You see the ads on TV. You see the stores set out their timely displays. And you tell yourself that this year will not be quite as painful. It will be better than last year.
But all of a sudden, Mother’s Day is just around the corner, and you realize that there are some places in our hearts never seem to fully heal. And you fear that this year will be like so many others before…
The hardest day of the year.
It’s hard for so many reasons. It’s hard because it’s also good. There are women in your life that you want to celebrate. There are women that you hope feel loved and special – women that you want to encourage to feel appreciated and seen.
But as you exhale, “Happy Mother’s Day,” you hold your breath and balance across the fine line that connects beauty and sorrow, crossing warily between joy and mourning.
For some, it is the deep ache – the whispered fear – that taunts relentlessly, “You will never know the joy of being a Momma.” It is a reminder of another year without a baby in your belly or in your arms. It seems like a day that celebrates the pain that you face silently.
For others, it is the painful truth that the phone won’t ring this Mother’s Day just like it didn’t ring last year or the year before. Because while attempts have been made to reach out, they are met with silence from the other end… prodigal children refusing to turn their faces towards home – towards the women who love them more than they could possibly comprehend. It’s hard for the women with children who refuse to acknowledge the love that gave them life.
And still yet, for those who have lost their own Mommas. It is the hardest day of the year for you sweet women who will celebrate the joys of motherhood without your own to hold your hand and show you the way. For you who would give anything to crawl up in your Momma’s lap and tell her just how much you miss her, how much you need her, how you still don’t know how you’re going to do this without her.
But with every Mom-filled commercial on TV, or article online, with every reminder of the pain in your own heart – I want you to know, friend, that you don’t have to listen to the ugly lies that skim just below the surface of joy.
The lies that say it will always be this hard or that it will always be this painful or overwhelming. The lies that say there will never be true joy. There will never be a settled peace. The lie that says there is no way it could ever change…
No, friend, don’t listen to that. Because no matter what makes this day painful… no matter what set of circumstances makes this the hardest day of the year…
The truth is? You’re going to be okay. Your heart will find hope and healing again. It will make its way towards promise and possibility, because the end of your story has yet to be written…. And the things you are dreaming of today pale in comparison to the reality that is in store for your days to come.
You are seen, friend. You are loved. Your story and your pain and your feelings are recognized… even for just a moment, I want you to know that it’s okay for you to miss your momma, or be sad that you’re not yet a momma, or simply wish to be called momma… because while this day is beautiful and wonderful and worthy of celebrating, I see you too – I acknowledge you who will call this the hardest day of the year.
To you? I simply want to say, It’s not the end. Hang on to the God of Hope – because just when you don’t think you can go any farther… just when you think you won’t be able to face one more Mother’s Day like this? Hope steps in and changes everything.
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