There’s this ache that says, “You’re supposed to love this. You’re supposed to love this and be better at all of this. There’s probably something wrong with you. You need to figure it out. Get it together. Figure out how to make yourself enjoy it all more.”
And you believe it. So you look around and you tell yourself, “Self! Enjoy it more!” You make promises like, “Tomorrow I’m going to enjoy it all more! We’re going to the park or to the library! We will read books and laugh, and I will play with them. This is my joy! Not my job.”
But after another restless night of sleep, morning comes full of so many of the things that you were hoping to avoid. And the next thing you know, the voice is back. “See. Today’s no better. It’s always going to be this hard. It’s always going to be this exhausting. Other moms could handle all of this with so much more grace than you!”
And you believe that familiar ache again. You’re exhausted, and you’re discouraged, and now there’s this guilt that won’t let you forget any of it.
Be happier!
Be more fun!
Your kids deserve better!
And so you try harder. Like a hamster on a wheel, you just keep running. Trying. Trying. Trying.
Until you run out. You run right out of everything. You run out of hope. You run out of happy. You run out of try. And as you sit there, feeling like everyone is running right past you, you forget who is sitting right there with you.
He’s easy to miss sometimes.
When you’re so busy running… trying… doing your best to do it all in your own strength, it’s easy to miss the One who has been with you, speaking Truth over your heart the whole time.
Can you hear Him? His words are like a balm to that ache deep in your soul.
He says, “There’s nothing wrong with you. I know it’s hard, but you don’t have to figure it out on your own. I can help. I want to help. I’ve seen you pour out every ounce of your heart like an offering. And I know that Love often looks like sacrifice. But My sacrifice meant we could do this together. It meant that you never had to be alone again. It’s not always going to be this hard. It’s not always going to be this overwhelming. And the joy will come when you let Me be your strength.”
And as you hear His voice, you realize you had been believing lies. You had been listening as the enemy relentless pointed out all of your shortcomings. But as Truth fills your heart, and you hear the voice of Jesus, you understand that maybe hope doesn’t always come like a better night of sleep or finding the right article with the right parenting strategy.
Sometimes, hope looks like surrender.
It doesn’t look like pushing forward. It looks like leaning back into the only One who can carry from this place. And tonight, before the week gets going, let’s both remember that being a happy mommy might just start when we let Jesus make us a whole mommy. Yes, we’re supposed to enjoy this, but let’s decide right now to have grace for the moments when we just don’t.
You’re a good mom. A really stinkin’ good mom.
Let’s pray together.
Lord, thank You for only speaking kindly to us. When we hear words that aren’t kind, even our own thoughts, help us remember that those aren’t from You. They’re NEVER from You. Give us courage to fall back into You. When everything in us wants us to push harder, teach us how to surrender. Teach us how to trust You. And, Lord, restore the joy in our hearts as You show us how to have grace for right where we are, and remind us that we are never alone. In Jesus’s name we pray. Amen.